Saturday 11 September 2010

Get In The Queue

I don’t know if he was having me on but we were discussing ordering some stock for the wine cellar, which is HUGE at the mansion, like you’d expect, and Irwin got a phone call. Only it was one of these stupid texts. It was just a capital Q with an arrow pointing to the right, like this: Q-->

Apparently, he’d been winding up one of his mates with some false information and the mate had just found out that his leg was being pulled. And instead of expressing himself verbally, he’d gone for a new symbol, which is supposed to be all the rage with the people who send each other pointless texts.

The symbol, Irwin explained when he’d got over his incredulity at my ignorance, is an invitation to join the “far queue”. Or as Frank Zappa might have put it: “Far queue. Far queue very much!“

The trick is to say it with the right accent and the right degree of conviction and vehemence.

I just thought I’d share that with my adoring public in case there are any like me who refuse to text.

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