Time Travel

Ilya got a week off in episode 17, and missed a bloke getting on a plane with a gun in a shoulder holster! They really were different times back then if you could get away with something like that.

Well, yes

Labour’s current leader, Sir Smarmer, is behaving like Dr. Corbyn’s monster with his desire to price the offspring of poor people out of posh schools.
    But it has been pointed out that if the wonks in charge of university selection are deliberately excluding candidates from better schools, he’s doing the poor kids a favour.
    Pretty much along the lines of: “I’m not going to shoot you today, but I might tomorrow.”

Nothing changes

Wow! I hadn’t realized that the Schmuck From Uncle is so old that it started off in black & white. Back then, the Russians were the bad guys; apart from Ilya, of course. And they still are.

Waste of time

Why do bad guys demand a lawyer after Maigret has outwitted them? Won’t do them any good. How come even the clever ones are too dense to see that?

Pulling the ladder up

I suppose it’s inevitable that Sir Smarmer would feel a need to claim he’ll try to force private schools out of business if he gets to be prime minister. It’s what the looney Labourites seem to do. Hypocrisy R Us.

Get out of that

One of the perils of recording films to watch later with fast-forwarding through the adverts is trying to record one daft sciffy film only to find that the TV channel showed a different one for no apparent reason.

Useless bunch

Well, that’s Sky for you. Half a dozen episodes of the final series of Stargate SG-1 left, boot them into touch, who cares? I suppose I can always record some episodes of the Schmuck From Uncle if I get desperate for something to watch in the evening.

Underperforming?

My sofa has grounds for complaint. It hasn’t had 316 drinks spilt on it; something the experts claim is normal; and it certainly hasn’t been allowed to swallow the TV remote control 346 times. Or gobble up £155 million per year in loose change.

Neat idea

French coastguards don’t respond to phone calls from sinking boat people in the Channel. They assume the call comes from British waters and they choose not to get involved to avoid a diplomatic invasion/incident. How very Gallic.

Short-changed

“Sigs” said the sub-title in an episode of Maigret when someone heaved a sigh. Consistently. Did they run out of h’s?
    “Played Mariel with him.” Did they mean ‘merry Hell’? Where do they get these clowns?

Reality deficit

Legendary footballer Bill McNeill. Legendary broadcaster Michael Parkinson. Does that mean they never existed if they’re just legends?

Slow news day?

Newsreader I’ve never heard of stalked by reality ‘star’ I’ve never heard of. And that’s supposed to be front page stuff?

Just plain silly

Saying a World Cup pundit was ‘forced’ off the air after she was told her mother had been killed accidentally is ludicrous. Forced by blokes with guns? What BS.

Unrecorded record

Has a TV wrestling ref ever made the 10-second count for one or both competitors to get back into the ring last more than five minutes? If not, why not?

Up then down

On Thursday: “Nation gives thanks as England captain is cleared to play”. Tripe. Most not bovvered.
On Saturday: “England booed off after horror display”. Goalless draw with USA. Those who didn’t watch were shamelessly glad they didn’t waste the time.

Obviously Censored

PM calls nurses’ demand for a 19% pay rise unaffordable? If he’s a true-blue Brit, ludicrous plus an adjective beginning with ‘f’ would have been appropriate. But is he true-blue?

Another big yawn

Is a scoreless draw with the US really front-page news? Apparently so in some parts of wherever Fleet Street is now.

NFL Thanksgiving Revelation

What sort of name is Saquon?? How on earth did the poor guy’s parents come up with that? Makes him sound like an alien from the planet Zarg.

Fantasy Fringe

54 is mid-life for women? On what planet? Certainly not this one.

No Sale

Sir Starmer’s act doesn’t seem to be going down at all well with people with a working brain. They know the man who tried to sell us Jeremy Corbyn as a brilliant PM is a lawyer. Which means he’ll tell us black is white, yellow, orange, purple or any other colour he thinks will do his bank balance some good.

Had enough

This Sky TV crap of entering your PIN to watch an episode of Stargate SG-1 before 8 p.m. is beyond a joke. Still, I’m looking forward to booting Sky into touch when series 10 finishes.

No escape

I see the TV loan spivs are still around. But they want only 100% interest now rather than the 4,000% demanded by the Wonga puppets.

Right destination?

Giving the RFK Ripple of Hope to Moaning Meghan and her hairy husband has put some backs up. But when you look at who’s received it previously; the likes of Slick Willy Clinton, his poisonous missus and the Democrap Reps. leader Nasty Pelosi; maybe they’re in good company.

One way street

How strange that anyone on the Labour side of the divide who says being wealthy isn’t a sin always turns out to be a former Labour MP.
    Shame they can’t see the light; or admit that they have; whilst they’re actively trying to steal cash from people they think have too much of it with Gordon Brown-style stealth taxes. You know, the ones the Tories have adopted as part of their strategy to make themselves indistinguishable from the party of inevitable disaster.

Going the other way

The Tories are leaping aboard the Labour tax & waste bandwagon and it looks like the Labour leader has done another U-turn to jumping aboard the one for checking migration.
    The manifestos for the next election are going to make very confusing reading.

Right attitude

The manager of England’s football team has the right attitude; taking a swipe at his bunch of slackers for letting Iran put two goals past them. Definitely no bonuses for that.

Which privilege?

It makes rather a mockery of the concept of rules if the internet moaners expect the contestants in a TV show to have to remain diversely mixed all the way through – no matter how untalented some of them minority contestants are.

Some joke

I read with a sense of disbelief that a 16-year-old kid has been given an NHS appointment for 2025 for a non-life-threatening condition.
    Nothing like planning well ahead!

Tripe

England rocked by armband farce? Must be a bunch of real wimps if they really were!

Busted Flush

Man. Utd. is well shot of Ronald Ho. He’s a lot more trouble than he’s worth now.

TV idea

Walter, Texas Ranger – the technical whizz of the Stargate control room moves to a career in law enforcement.

Murder in Minnesota

The NFL does some good bits, though; like Maher kicking a 60-yard field goal at the end of the first half of the Dallas vs the Vikings, only to be told they were still reviewing the previous play; the sideline catch by a team mate that set up the kick.
    The catch was okay and so was the re-kick. Benefiting from the rehearsal? 40-3 final!

Just over-charging

Is the loss of beer @ the World Cup matches any great loss if it costs twelve quid for half a litre of American stuff? That’s a shameful rip-off, whatever way you look at it.

Good One

There was some pretty amazing stuff in Grey Cup 109, particularly in the 4th quarter. Stuff that makes the wider-open and faster CFL put the NFL in the shade.
    All those who were saying it’s about time the East won one are looking smug.

Only fair

Owners of electric vehicles should be paying road tax now, not two years hence. Their tyres are wearing out road surfaces and creating the potholes that councils can’t be bothered repairing because they’re too busy wasting our cash on diversity and other trivial crap.

There’s only so much attention

Comedian David Badeil claims that Jews, like himself, don’t count. But could it just be that with all the available other minorities yelling for attention, his isn’t getting enough to satisfy him?

Modern magic

Something else I read: civil servants skiving @ home can be on a picket line in spirit by being part of a video mob on a large-screen TV waved about by a couple of burly union stooges.

Makes sense

If a nutter is handcuffed to a gantry over a motorway, I read, then he/she isn’t going anywhere and the traffic can keep flowing in perfect safety.
    And any coppers who stop the traffic can be charged with interfering with it and hit with a stonking fine!!

No thanks

Do I want to watch the England football team kneeling down in support of a dead American criminal today? Pass.

Winter draws on

The main topic for conversation this morning seems to be how cold it has gone suddenly. Bring back global warming!

Aptly named

That FIFA bloke who did a weird rant on the eve of the World Cup start is called Gianni Infantino, I read. Infantino is Italian for little baby. Figures!

Who needs turkey anyway?

What’s the big deal about steak for Xmas dinner? Been there, got the T-shirt, highly recommended.

Lots of days off tomorrow

The CFL reaches its Grey Cup conclusion today. At 4 o’clock in the morning, as far as the TV coverage is concerned. There will be a few faces absent at breakfast time tomorrow!

Third time lucky

Well, NASA managed to launch the Artemis rocket and send its payload on the way to the Moon. Will it get there? Will it be able to go into orbit there? Will anything work? Place your bets @ the usual outlets!

Such tripe!

Did the world hold its breath when that Russian missile killed two people in Poland? Hysterical nonsense. Large parts of the world didn’t know what had happened. Fact.

Wot a shame!

Budweiser beer throws lots of cash at FIFA, then the Qataris ban sales of it at matches. Will they get a refund, though?

There are alternatives

Anything on TV? Nope. What’s recorded, then? An episode of Maigret with comic sub-titles and the Classic Albums treatment of Morrison Hotel. Gets the job done when what the usual suspects have to offer is crap.

Zero impact

Welsh actor with same surname as motorcycling superstar & legend throws wobbly at Prince William to get self noticed.
    Majority reaction is: “Who?”
    Oh, dear.

Big Surprise Ending

Charlie’s Hooligans (2019) featuring Captain Picard’s grandfather as the compulsorily retired Bosley? And not a moment too soon, I might add, if he thinks he’s Hannibal Smith reincarnated.

Costa Non-Crisis

It was very encouraging to read through a list of the branded products that have gone up in price by anything from one-third to over 50% and be assured by the Mansion’s shoppers that they never buy them!

Fear not

‘Fears the 1.5c climate target could be axed’, read the headline. Well, one and a half cents ain’t going to buy that much anyway, so no great loss, eh?

Not that easy

‘Paedophiles can view child sexual abuse in 3 clicks’, said the article. In the spirit of seeking enlightenment, I clicked my mouse 3 times. Nothing.
    Maybe I should have done right clicks?

Appropriate job

Shame that Man. Utd. has taken so long to spot that Ronald Ho is a cheat and a back-stabber and thoroughly unreliable. Maybe they should give him a job sweeping up in the stands until his agent can find some other mug who’s willing to buy out his contract.

Also dying to be vexed

A lady journalist wants a sneering comedian banned from HER TV screen. Doesn’t she realize she doesn’t have to switch on when he’s on? Probably not.

More yawning

The idle chatterboxes who have nothing better to do with themselves than whinge on the internet about the mob going to the climate junket in Egypt arriving in 400 private jets are on a loser.
    Like the likes of Creaky Joe would travel on an el cheapo airline to a junket. Moan if no one goes, moan if world leaders do go. It’s all so predictable and worthless.

Crossword Compiler lacking Inspiration

Cooking bulbs (5). Onions! Really? How bleedin’ pathetic can you get? Actually, much more than that if they try.

Any old excuse

Someone found a noose at the site of the library being built for ex-president O’Bummer in the States. Take it down, chuck it away, get on with the job?
    Oh, no. Down tools and throw a wobbly about slavery. Any old excuse not to get on with it.

Even less friendly

The nurses’ union is reported to have hoovered up £50 MILLION to hand to their member in strike pay to keep one going for months. Definitely no bloody clapping. Throwing things, more like.

Soon be over & out

We’re now doing series 10 of Stargate SG-1 on Sky Max, which explains why everything is so familiar. I started watching the complete run-through – back at the beginning of July! – right after an earlier, more leisurely run-though had ended. Babylon 5 next; on DVD or TV. Not bothered.

Not very interesting

Who cares about the Lucan case after a gap of 50 years? He must be dead by now, so he’s never going to end up in the OAP wing of Dartmoor. But there’s always someone who thinks they can make a few bob out of it, I suppose.

Not very friendly

President Creaky Joe seems to have joined Team Putin with his efforts to bully Ukraine into doing a deal that lets Putin the Poisoner get away with his invasion.

Even bigger guess

The £50 BILLION Gordon Brown Hole in the economy is based on deliberately false accounting, I read. Why? In an attempt to discredit the idea that cutting taxes encourages growth and actually increases revenue.
    As Sir Arthur C. Clarke observed, for every expert, there is an equal and opposite expert.

Big Deal

The national average for phone consumption is 19 in the average lifetime. Who the hell cares? And what sort of idiot wastes money on making a guess like that?

One thing in his favour

Out current prime minister can do something that most others can’t. He can annoy the hell out of the Labour scroungers by being rich and there’s nothing they can do about it!

Nah

‘Four weeks that changed the world’ with football as what’s being sold. Sorry, Sky, not buying it.
    Not that encountering refuseniks will stop Sky plugging this show at every opportunity.

Roll up

Is there anyone who isn’t threatening to go on strike in the next few weeks? They’re going to have to get their skates on to cook up a spurious grievance before Xmas.

What sense

Fracking for shale gas is okay in the United States but nokay here. Importing shale gas from the US is a brilliant idea even though it would be cheaper and more environmentally friendly to do it here. But only to politicians.

What fun

Are we going to have a slavery-themed Xmas this year so that the tossers who keep pretending it’s all the British were ever about can whinge even more?

In one eye, out the other

By the time they’ve got through the list of company names at the start of a film, and all the cute animated logos as well, it’s possible to have lost the will to live.

No complaints

I’m definitely not complaining about the weather being warm and sunny at the moment. If this is global warming, it was certainly a great investment on our part!

Had to happen

Crash test dummies are having to be bulked up, I read, to simulate what happens to members of an obese population when they have a shunt. Why, I also read, has it taken so long for the industry to do this when the moans about Fat Britain have been going on for years?

No way traffic

So-called smart motorways looks like something to avoid like, well, the Chinese plague. There aren’t enough people in the control rooms watching what’s going on a lot of the time and the technology for warning about crashes doesn’t work.

That’s enough, thanks

The Aquaman film on TV last night was a lot like the endings of the Supergirl TV series. BIG battles with lots of CGI all over the place over and over.
    I think I’ve reached my lifetime quota of mindless destruction and I don’t need to watch any more of this ilk.

Get Tough

A spot fine of £1,000 for eco-terrorists who stop traffic and get people killed is not enough. They should have their driving licence cancelled if they have one, and have to go through the whole process of passing the test again. And if they have a passport, cancelled too.

More mangled subs

Someone getting a Zertand for the phone in an episode of Maigret, we were expected to believe? Could they mean jeton?
    There is nothing at all called a Zertand, according to a search on the WWW.
    Sack the subtitle proof clown!

Most likely explanation

The TV is suddenly ignoring the remote control. Batteries? First check for a cat’s tail dangling in front of the bit that detects signals from the remote.

One-way traffic

King Charles is all in favour of breast-beating about the slave trade. But it’s strange no one expects the Africans who rounded up their fellow Africans to sell to Arabs & Europeans are ever required to do any.

Institutional Doublethink

One day, we get complaints about schools being full of fat kids. The next, the looney left are claiming schools are full of starving kids. Really? No hope of anything coherent?

Not paying attention

Why are so few men having weight-loss surgery that could save their lives? yelled the headline.
    Has no one told the journalist who cobbled together the story that the NHS is overloaded and no longer working?

We should be told

Is Ed Milibank a genuine dickhead with not even one brain cell to rub together? Or is he just an attention-seeker who hasn’t been given any recently?

Good put-down!

“I see the NHS backlog due to the Chinese plague means you haven’t had your sense of proportion transplant yet.”
    Applicable to most politicians.

Pack it in

Who is it who keeps pulling the plug on GB Views? Last night and the night before during the bit I’d switched over for. Most annoying.

Try Harder

I watched the film Convoy last night. That had to be one of the stupidest and most contrived endings to a film ever.

Not sold

Your webcam is insecure, AVG AntiVirus keeps assuring me. How can that be? I wonder, when I can see it sitting a few feet away from the computer because something else is plugged in to the USB port that it was using.

Is there a choice?

Pure Stupidity, yelled the headline. Is that better than impure stupidity? I wondered.

Out of the tree

Is there anything that’s too stoopid for the climate loonies like Edstone Miliband and War on Want to yell?
    There’s attention-seeking and their mindless psychosis.
    The notion of the UK donating ONE TRILLION QUID, that’s one million million pounds, to countries like Pakistan where people will persist in living in areas which they know will flood is just certifiable.

A vehicle for his anguish, indeed!

How did Mark Rothko get away with it? The TV programme about his work last night suggested that all he did was create a body of work about which pseuds could spout endless drivel!
    Jackson Pollock, from the same tribe of New Yorkers, had something.

Utter Rubbish

We are being assured that warmer autumns are evidence of a climate crisis. Not something people who have to pay less for heating would agree with.

Today’s Question

Would you know James Corden if you tripped over him on a dark night? Can’t say I would.

Do it, Get away with it

Putting shots of the cheat and junkie Maradona in football plug adverts tells us all we need to know about the corrupt management of world football now.

Drop Dead Ed

There must be a special circle of Hell for the likes of Red Ed Fukin Miliband, who have their fist up to the elbow in the taxpayer’s pocket and spend their day coming up with new scams to waste vast amounts of other people’s money.
    No, Ed, we shouldn’t pay for climate change we didn’t cause.

Truth will out

All the usual suspects are fleeing from Twitter now that Mr. Musk is shining a light into the fake accounts and the dodgy censorship practices. Which says more about those usual suspects than him.

Blame but no shame

The judge who did the inquiry into the Manchester Arena bombing gave the bozos in charge of the local emergency services a good chewing. Not that anyone expects them to be shoved in gaol for neglect of duty.
    Nothing ever changes. It was just the same in 2005 when mad Islamists were blowing up London. Lessons will never ever be learnt.

Good for a groan

Knock, knock!
    Who’s there?
Doctor.
    Doctor Who?
Nah, mate, I’m a bloke.

Done for now

A brass band did the Spanish anthem before the MotoGP race. Bagnaia or Quateraro for champ? They were scrapping furiously; would they take each other out?
    Marc Marquez & Miller battled ahead of them until Marquez crashed on lap 10/27. Rins was leading but got little attention. Bagnaia went backwards. Miller went into the gravel with 5 to go, tyres.
    Binder went past Martin for 2nd with 2 laps to go. Rinz was safe for a win, though. And Bagnaia became this season’s champion.

Nothing changes

The really depressing thing about looking back at recent history from about a decade ago is we’re still doing everything now that went on back then. Or the government is.
    Migration control was/is a shambles. Bogus asylum seekers were/are getting away with it. The economy was/is a shambles. Politicians were/are terminally corrupt, etc., etc.
    And the police were/are crap. And the useful idiots were/are trying to stop shale gas recovery.

Real concern

Does anyone have a Royal Warrant any more? I wondered while reading the wrapper on a fancy biscuit. “By appointment to HM The Queen”. But there’s no reason to assume her successor would have exactly the same tastes.

Action, Action

25 laps to decide the Moto2 title. Lots of action to get the comms yelling. A couple of back markers were gone with 19 to go, then the 6th place guy.
    Ogura, the only guy who could beat Fernandez, crashed on lap 8, leaving Fernandez able to fall off and stay champ. Chantra went at the same place as Ogura. Canet crashed from 4th, tyres. Acosta held on to the lead, Fernandez had a go but stayed 2nd. Arbolino was a distant 3rd.

The unsympathetic guru says:

“Oh, wise guru, what do you do if a cat parks on the newspaper you want to read?”
    “Tell her to shift her carcase.”
“What is she just sits there, looking at you?”
    “Then you are a failure as a human being.”

Closing stages

Already champion Guevara took the lead for 23 laps of Moto3 in Valencia. Everyone stayed aboard early on and it was unusually civilized and strung out. Öncü shadowed Guevara well ahead of the rest. Rossi was gone with 15 to go. 2 more gone in the next 10 laps. Can Öncü do it? Into the lead on the last lap but couldn’t stay there.

Complete one-off

That’s something I never do: watch one of the first 5 TV channels all evening. In this case, last night, it was a crap remake of Godzilla, followed by the Top 25 Morcambe & Wise comedy routines on Channel 5.

Very Strange

A Friday before Bonfire Night is usually very loud, whatever the weather. Nothing much last night. Not that the Mansion Cat was bothered. No need for her to take refuge from all the noise in her secret hiding place.

Great Excuse

Apparently, the PM is going to Egypt to sign off on last year’s climate jamboree in Scotland, and that’s why he’s skiving somewhere sunny instead of fixing our problems here. Couldn’t he have given the signing off job to Wee Burney Sturgeon, who’s always telling us Scotland belongs to her?

No, thanks

What a daft idea fried-egg crisps is. Eggs, my local expert assures me, pong because they’re loaded with stinky sulphur compounds. Not something you’d want to experience if you’d shelled out a fiver for a miserable little bag of crisps.

Yawn

Does anyone give a rat’s hindquarters for what Lord Lucan did or didn’t do 50 years ago? Thought not.

Another oddity

Something else strange is that the prime minister & his Chancellor have ruled out sticking people who make a GP appointment then don’t bother to turn up or cancel with a £10 fine.
    Especially if they’re turning their back on millions of pounds as it’s a significant problem.

Ask the expert

Strange no one has consulted Greenhouse Greta about sorting out Putin. Or she hasn’t come up with a plan for tackling the biggest threat on the planet. But doing something useful never seems to be on the agenda for the average plastic messiah.

Still not getting it

I see the prime minister is still still pushing the ‘working hard’ cliché quite relentlessly.
    Strange that his minions haven’t told him that no one is impressed by that garbage any more as it is just a sign of laziness and deficient communication skills.

It was never about the climate

Pretty much the same, in reverse, can be said about the upcoming climate junket in Egypt. Nothing said or done there will make the slightest difference as Putin’s assault on Ukraine is setting the agenda for what’s affordable. Which means it doesn’t matter if our PM and/or King Charles goes/go.

It was never about the football

The upcoming World Cup in Qatar is making more trouble than you can shake a stick at. The self-righteous are trying to stop officials of the Scottish FA and Welsh MPs from going to enjoy a freebie, and the junketers are taking no notice.
    Which is in keeping with the spirit of the occasion, which is a hymn to the corruption at the top at FIFA rather than anything much to do with the once beautiful game.

Another ‘told you so’

The Low Traffic Neighbourhood schemes which are put in place to make life tough for motorists don’t decrease vehicle use and pollution.
    A study has found that motorists have to make longer journeys to reach their destination and therefore vehicle use and pollution are both up where LTNs are to be found.

Better things to do

Oh, dear. The doctor expert in my paper reckons we should spend 30 minutes per day doing video games to keep our minds alert.
    No thanks, especially as an afternoon snooze and spending time in a green space are also on the to-do list for padding out your day. Along with buying his book, of course.

Obviously useless

What do you say about someone wearing a baseball cap back to front?
    “He’s probably got his pants on backwards, too.”

A good reason

The list of times in seconds for how long people should be able to stand on one leg with eyes open and shut ends at 79. Presumably, everyone older has more sense than to get involved in this nonsense.

Not the right message, more of a right mess

Beheading killer gaoled for life on TV
    That’s what the headline said. Leaving the reader wondering if that means the killer was gaoled for life but they decided to behead her instead. And it will be on TV.
    That should be a HUGE ratings hit. Especially in Iran.

Sky TV has gone hopelessly wonk

Enter the TV PIN to watch the end of the kids’ programme Supergirl when you switch on for Stargate SG-1, even though it’s over and they’re in an advert break. Enter your PIN for an episode of SG-1 that’s been on early TV lots of times?
    Have the wonks @ Sky been taken over by the Goa’uld or the Ori?

Feline Priority

Using a computer can be a bit of a problem if there’s a cat parked on the mouse mat, waiting for one to show.

Collision Alert

Power companies that want people to use dodgy appliances at night to spread the demand, I read, will end up in a ding-dong with the nation’s Fire Brigades, who will have to do a lot more work in night shifts when the dodgy appliances self-combust. Like the fridge that did for Grenfell Tower.

No mercy

Should be shown to the judge who failed to gaol a stoopid attention seeker, who showered the statue of Sir Tom Moore with her own human sewage.
    There was no excuse for not sending her to gaol and the judge needs to be brought up on charges of misconduct in a public office.
    Not that fellow judges will do anything appropriate to the miscreant, of course. That would be much too much to expect.

Tell it like it is

Traffic Services: Keeping Traffic Moving.
    Joke. Making huge jams at vanity projects and getting in the way of ambulances, more like.

Grrrr!

What a bummer it is when the sub-titles get out of step with a TV programme. Luckily, it’s not something that happens very often. Hardly at all, really. Which makes it so noteworthy when it does happen.