Grab, grrr, grab

The juvenile docs will be leaping out on strike in the middle of June. All they want is a modest 24% pay rise on top of the 34% they’ve had over the last 4 years.

And so it goes on

President Thump sez: “Iran has made a deal.” Iran sez: “That’s bollocks.” Iran sez: “President Thump has made a deal.” To which Thump replies: “That’s bollocks.”

Tortured quibble

Does Ferrari’s half million quid electric super car look like a Nissan car costing 36 grand? Well, in the picture on offer, it has the same number of wheels and the bodywork is the same colour, more or less.

Fighting dirty

How do you get a no-parking message across to motorists who invade your fields in Cumbria? Spray the vehicles with slurry, is one farmer’s answer.
    Good business for the local car wash, too!

J.B delivers B.S

According to failed politician Jonah Burnbum, failed PM tony b. liar doesn’t understand people’s lives. But if all Jonah understands is how to wreck lives with looney Left policies, that hardly makes him worth anything.
● The Makerfield election has put Burnbum in a U-turn match with Serbia Smarmer as a result of Jonah’s collisions with reality.

Corporate B.S clunks

Using business jargon is a sign of lack of intelligence, the experts have concluded. When the dimmie says something like “working at pace” or “thinking outside the box”, the mouth is making noises but the brain is unlikely to know what it’s talking about and its owner is likely to make bad decisions.

The Numbers Game

Labour policies will put one in six young people on benefits by the end of the decade. This is caused by the high cost of living plan which is being used to reduce the birth rate making young people unemployable in the private, unsubsidized sector.

Today’s Question

Which cars are more explosive, the ones shown in American TV cop shops such as T.J. Hooker or the electric bombs on the roads today? Not much in it.

Highway hazard

What do you get if you pay 43 grand for a Volvo electric car? One you can’t get into multiple times if the key stops working, one that can burst into flames if you charge the battery to more than 70% of its capacity and one you can’t leave unattended whilst charging or parked in a covered area in case it burst into flames.
    This is what the likes of Edstone Milipede calls progress.