Not impressed, try harder

“I’ve been sober for 18 months,” some young lady bragged in the paper. “Big deal,” one of my mates responded. “I’ve been sober for decades.”
    This is a bloke who has just the one glass of wine with his dinner, the occasional glass of liqueur when he remembers to and the even more occasional glug of whisky in his tea.
    Which means he stays as sober as any judge and it ain’t all that big a deal.