Dr. Congo, the African country where there is a lethal ebola plague rampant, is a lousy employer if the staff; medical and security; at a treatment centre are on strike because the Dr. isn’t paying them properly.
Tuesday, 28 July 2026
Going up
“We need to be a costa living government”, Jonah told his Cabinet. So when it soars, you can’t say you weren’t warned!
The grabbing goes on
Angrier Robot is refusing to return £17K in excess severance pay now that she’s back in her old Cabinet job. She was always yelling that Tories should do it when in Opposition.
But she’s Labour, which means her rulz don’t apply to someone like her.
Non-stop
Over 50% of e-bikers feel entitled to ignore red traffic lights. Because they know they can get away with it? The figure for push-bikers is 20%.
Apologists for cyclists are trying to dump the blame on badly pohased traffic lights causing delays which impatient bikers find unreasonable.
Working at pace
The Scottish government is being applauded for doing a grand job of removing lethal cladding from hi-rise residential buildings. A magnificent total of three of them have been tackled out of around 1,000 declared at risk of an inferno caused by one of the occupants.
Man-made mayhem
The rewilders are getting a severe booting from the people who have been forced out of their homes by wildfires.
Just abandoning the countryside and making no effort to create fire-breaks and remove dead vegetation is an obvious recipe for disaster. But not one the burrocraps can see. And they are clearly not bovvered about the massacre of wildlife caused by their negligence.
Mega-mob
Forget small boats. Invaders are now arriving 165 at a time in dinghies eight metres long – the length of a bus – to get to Jonah Burnbum’s uncosted socialist paradise.
Messiah myth
The rampant charity sector in Scotland is banging on at the First Meenister, J. Swinney, to join in the Burnbum campaign to tackle street campers. Does that mean the rate will double north of the border, as it did when Jonah was in charge of Manchester?
Dream on, kid
Our leader of the moment definitely is a fantasist if Ran D. Eyelashes thinks he’s going to be able to order President Thump around.
Double bubble
Another Daily Disaster reader realized that pensioners can use their hosepipe to water the gardens of neighbours as well as their own garden.
Always a price to pay
Stick a fat jab in your tum and your chances of going bald shoot up, the experts here and in the US have found. Oh, well. You can’t win because you’re not supposed to.
Good point
A Daily Disaster reader decided that if the Labour government keeps claiming that the state pension is a benefit, not something paid for via decades of contributions, then pensioners are excused hosepipe bas along with the people on actual benefits.
Bus-size lie
Our Pretender Fantasist announced his bus fare scam standing in front of a bus bearing the slogan “Funded By UK Government”.
But the government doesn’t have any money. It just wastes OUR money grabbed via taxes and other scams.
But “Lies don’t count to Labour”?
● The bus fare scam is something else that’s unfunded – just a mere half a billion quid needed from . . . somewhere.
Facts of life
1. Jonah Burnbum is refusing to admit how much his jaunt to his temporary No. 10 North in Manchester in the weekend just gone cost the taxpayer.
2. 80% of respondents to a poll decided No. 10 North is a pointless ego trip and a waste of money.
3. Jonah’s council house building splurge is unfunded to the tune of £8 BILLION.
Monday, 27 July 2026
Permanent dry spell
Water UK has delivered a boot up the bum to the government, which isn’t bovvered about all the cooling water which its scam to cover acres of the country with A.I data centres will need.
There isn’t enuff to go round now, sez WUK, which oversees the water companies. Not something the Westminster fantasists want to hear.
Safe passage
Burnbum Boats are now getting the Benefit of the Border Farce taxi service across the Channel. But we’re not allowed to notice the continued influx of illegals.
Gang-smashing isn’t on the agenda of the bloke who could ignore the Rochdale groomers.
More financial fantasy
Fortifying a bomb-proof building opposite the town hall in Manchester to make it No. 10 North will costa bomb and the security bill will costa second bomb.
The Downing Street spokes claims there will be no extra cost to the taxpayer. Derision is the only response to a lie like that.
Exit stage left
The new safeguarding minister is toast after a couple of months. Her job was to protect females from violence but her complaint that Reform members don’t deserve the same security ‘as the rest of us’ after the brutal murder of Anne Widdecombe wasn’t exactly a confidence-builder.
Same thing only different
It’s not a U-turn, it’s a B-turn when our Pretender Fantasist Jonah Burnbum does one.
It has the same effect as one of Bier Smarmer’s dithers but we’re not to supposed to notice that.
The latest turn-around is on letting dangerous criminals out of gaol early to buy their votes. Someone has told Jonah it’s not a good idea and he’s swithering.
All visitors victorious?
The TigerCats and the Alouettes finished Week 8 of the CFL on a steamy night. A FG to start for the home team. The Cats were sacked to a punt. The Als had to punt and saw the ball returned for a TD! 7-3. The Als lost a fumble recovery on a review. Into Q2, red zone for the Als, Charge! for a TD, 7-10.
Another sack by the Als. Then they were went out on downs on a 3rd & 1. Another sack by the Als. A pick by the Cats in the last minute stopped the Als.
Ford did a sprint in Q3 then fired a TD pass to Lawler, 15-10. Another Charge! by the Als for a TD, 15-17. The Cats kicked a FG, 18-17. In Q4, the Als recovered a fumble then lost the ball!
The Als went ahead with a FG, 18-20. The Cats gave the ball away; no end at a snap. A FG with 2 minutes left got the Als to 18-24 with a rouge from the kick off. A pick stopped the Cats. Red zone for the Als, on to a TD, 18-31 final, first home team win this week.
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