No Sale

Phone rings, mobile phone number, don’t recognize it.
    “Hello.”
    “I’m calling about your BT internet.” Female voice, Indian accent.
    “Oh, so you’re a scammer?”
    Connection broken, by her, on to the next target.

Catnapper

A delivery driver who strolled off with a West Yorkshire family’s cat may might maybe face gaol time!! The Pet Abduction Act (2024) applies to England and Northern Ireland. The penalty is up to 5 years in gaol and/or a fine.
    A light tap on the wrist with a Labour government working hard to keep its supporters out of gaol?

Reality check needed

Temperatures in March have been called ‘the most extreme heat event in the world climatic history’. Really? In the history of a planet that’s been around for billions of years? More extreme than the briefest Ice Age - a negative heat event? Come on!

Running riot

Clueless parents are getting the blame for over-active kids causing trouble in schools. The kids are getting too many energy drinks loaded with caffeine and sugary snacks. They lose concentration when the hit fades and run riot whilst it lasts, assaulting teachers without inhibition.

Extortionately grand

Never Here Bier, our Prime Fantasist, is averaging one hundred grand per jaunt for his trips abroad. Hus current total is £4.2 million and, at the same rate, it will be up to £14 million wasted by the middle of 2029. Another candidate for A.I-ship?

Not To Be

The juvenile doctors have decided to turn Easter into a 6-day break. Their pay review panel recommended a rise of 3.5% for them. They are still demanding 29%.

Censorship by the back door

Ofcom is getting a booting for taking the side of the climate criminals. Any broadcaster which lets a guest point out things like the CC are deliberately trying to create fake anxiety will be in trouble, and free speech will be banned if the CCs get their way.