Broken system

Labour’s switch from interviewing people to just accepting what’s on a form when they claim benefits has resulted in a huge rise on the cost of sickness claims.
    As the UK has not suddenly got sicker, this is clear evidence that Labour is abusing the system to buy votes.

Still not my P.M

There’s no point in listening to Randy Laburnum. He might have his plans for wrecking the joint but nothing will ever come of them. The rest of the Labour mob will just keep him doing U-turns until he’s even dizzier, just like Smarmer.

Left out

A respectable councillor was shoved in gaol for stuff posted online briefly and being a Tory when Bier Smarmer was trying to look tough. A green grotter transpicater has been busted for celebrating the murder of A. Widdecombe. Any chance of the Procurator Fiscal doing the same to Herbert? Joke.

Spot the source

“What we really want to see is a bloke with a long history of dishonesty on TV telling us we can trust a woman with an equally long history of dishonesty.”
    Said by whom about whom?

Built-in failure

A main reason why the NESO, which reported a loss of $409 million in 2024/25, can’t cope is the Milipede obsession with occasionals.
    When the wind don’t blow and the sun don’t shine, they can’t be turned up to meet demand and the result is loss of control and a scramble for more from reliable energy sources.
    Which is why the cost of electricity in the UK is so stupidly excessive.

Diving into disaster

A failed stamp duty dodger as housing sec. A convicted fraudster back on the gravy train. A guarantee to end rough sleeping; something that was doubled instead of delivered in Manchester; and that’s just for starters.
● Nothing about stopping the boats and smashing the gangs.

Today’s Wisdom

Turn the page quickly at an “open letter” advert in a newspaper and it becomes a closed one in the blink of an eye.