Got is sussed?

Regular readers of the Daily Disaster can be forgiven for thinking that the spirit of April Fool’s Day thrives the year round, particularly when “studies” are offered for our amusement. So when I read that 5 a day isn’t enough for me to live forever, I should be eating 7, 10 or even 13 portions of fruit & veg. every day, the Foolometer chunked into action. But it got excited again when I read that statins have the same effect as Viagra. And kept on chunking as I progressed through today’s paper.