Wednesday, 30 October 2019

Broking stock

I’ve been looking up the meaning of some common terms in the stock industry to be able to talk to my broker. Here are some good ones:
LEVERAGE -- System for removing cash caught in the fingers of suspicious customers
APPRECIATION -- What brokers fail to show after taking all your money off you in exchange for shares which nose-dive
ARBITRAGE -- Legalized way of betting both ends against the middle
ASSET ALLOCATION -- Diversification of investments for risk management purposes, such that the lion's share ends up in the broker's hip pocket
AUTOTRADER -- Computer program which lets an amateur investor blow his savings without having to press the buttons himself

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