Balkan Balderdash

An old bloke shoots the prime minister of Slovakia, who’s a mate of Putin the Poisoner, five times at close range; but fails to kill him.
    Suddenly, we’re on the edge of another European war. Well, that’s what the crisis confecters would have us believe.
    Some days, it’s hard to decide how many pairs of pants to put on to remain decently covered after the day’s total has been scared off.