Truly Unending

TV is indeed digital heaven. Last night, we got the last ever episode of Stargate SG-1 [series 10, episode 20, Unending] @ 6 p.m. followed by the first ever episode [series 1/1, Children of the Gods, part 1] @ 7 p.m.
    And if Skym Axe keeps on showing the series at its current rate of 10 episodes per week, anyone who missed an earlier showing will have done the entire series at the end of October.
    Which will leave three films to catch up on.

Unwanted

If 75% of the adults in the UK have been targetted by a scammer this year, and I haven’t, am I entitled to feel left out?

Gorn!

Big build up @ Swig, then a quick let down. Ms Radical Canoe and Andy ‘got his bloody gob wide open’ gone in round 2 of the tennis. Oh, well.

Nervous time?

That was a good story – that Prince Charles was told that he was in danger of being left in Rwanda if he started attacking the government’s policies when he was at the Commonwealth heads’ beanfeast there.

Predictable, I suppose

Cowboys & Indians themes banned from Blackpool’s famous illumination? Clearly, the looney left never ever stop and wonder what others think of them.

Moot Point

Is migration such a wonderful benefit to the nation? Not if it brings nasties like polio back here, it’s not.

Putin the ‘blat’ into blatant

Is it suspicious that Labour lost its deposit in the by election won by the Trivials and vice versa? Looks very like they’re trying to create an everyone against the Tories cabal despite their protestations of innocence.

More subtitles

Again from an episode of Maigret:
    “He’s out to make his name.”
    “Over our dead buddies.” [bodies]
Conte for compte – doesn’t parle Francais. And Cun later on.
    Hotel BeauSe jour [Beau Séjour]
    “Stand by the dark.” [stand by to duck!]
Something really weird was an earthenware jar labelled ‘farine’ with no lid, into which the bad guy was able to tip some arsenic. Who doesn’t put a lid on the flour jar??

They still got an order from me

The discount bookseller PostScript has made this Russian History Month. An award due for bad timing?
    Luckily for them, the rest of the catalogue contained books that were too tempting for me to ignore, and the shelves of my library are going to be groaning even louder in a day or two.

Way off target

A billion heartbeats in a lifetime, was offered as a reality in the latest episode of McDonald & Dodds. Tripe. At 72 beats per minute, that amounts to 37.87 million per year. One billion implies a life span for humans of 26 years or so. Which is bollocks.

Dreamland

“Contact your GP practice”, say the TV ad for something or other. Like you can still do that nowadays!

Nothing like a threat to the cash . . .

. . . to stir up the legal lot. Which is why the Labour lords are intent on sabotaging the government’s Bill of Rights, which will cut a big chunk out of the profits of the legal trade if the bogus ones are binned.

Best abandoned

I flashed through a WW advert during a CFL replay session; and saw just enough to remind me how much I don’t miss The Miz.

It’s happening?

There have been lots of jokes about how the best way to get the UK’s carbon footprint down to zero would be to kill all the inmates. Looks like Dr. Watts of NHS England is taking a first step in that direction by discouraging GPs from having direct contact with patients.

Main Event

Zoom! Bagnaia off from pole for 26 laps of MotoGP. Quateraro crashed, shunting Espargaro off the track – but he kept going and rejoined way down the field. Morbidelli gone, on his own, with 19 left. Then D. Binder.
    Quateraro, amazingly, had rejoined, hoping for the odd point if lots of others crashed but his second crash was enough to leave him battered & out.
    Spots of rain on the camera with 7 to do; didn’t come to anything. Bezzecchi finished 2nd, Viñales 3rd and Espargaro got to 4th from 15th!

Utter Failure @ Life

How does a BBC presenter get to the age of 37 without knowing how to wash her hair properly? What planet does the Beeb do its recruiting on?

More of it

The comms went wild at the start of 24 laps of Moto2. Sam Lowes had bike problems. Schrotter was ahead at half-way but crashed out. Dixon did his best, got to 2nd but finished 3rd. Ogura did his best to catch Fernandez but finished 2nd. Vietti set the fastest lap, having punting another competitor off the track. Arenas crashed in 4th with 2 laps to go.

Great Stuff!

No one fell off on lap1/22 of the Dutch MotoGP @ Assen, which is a great place for overtaking. A long lap loop for championship hopeful Foggia dropped him from 5th to 13th. McPhee, leading the chase group, was promoted to 6th and reached 3rd.
    Foggia got tangled up with the kerbs and crashed out with 5 laps to go. Title challenge over? Guevara was solidly in the lead until lap 20. McPhee was shunted off on the last lap and Sasaki scored his first ever win.

Not Impressed

AEW Dynamite had a turkey of a start this week with 20 minutes of ranting. Who do they think they are? The WW? Nice to see Orange Cussedly back and larking about.

Reality Bite

NCIS from the beginning on 5USA? Gulp, said one of my senior correspondents. It goes on for about 20 series. Am I going to live long enough to see all of it?

More wokery

Do we really need cute names for heat waves to go with the ones for storms? There are obviously a lot of people around with too little useful stuff to do.

Getting it wrong

The US Supreme Court keeps on confirming that great wisdom does not come with great age.

Very over-egged

The whole world is wondering why R. Murdoch and J. Hall are getting a divorce? Maybe 0.0000000001% of it.

No Sale

Is ‘crocodile style’ any sort of recommendation for a garage door, as the TV ad in the Dirty Harry film** wanted us to believe. I mean, what do crocodiles know about garage doors anyway?
** The one with the exploding toy car and the harpoon.

Balanced Universe

The Universe giveth – a rare second term for a sitting president of France for E. Macron, and the Universe taketh away – his parliamentary majority. Fair enough.

Just Tripe

It’s all very well for Shell and others to go on about ‘clean’ energy created in this country but swallowing their pitch needs the rest of us not to know that the atmosphere is in circulation everywhere and the crap generated over China and India, etc. ends up here too.

Past Blaster

Labour isn’t working. Where have we heard that before?

Good point

Presidential dignity was distinctly absent when Joe Biden got his feet tangled when dressed up in his biking outfit and fell off. Could you imagine Donald Trump or the saintly J.F.K. doing the same? Trying for a young image is all very well but you need to be able to pull it off.

They’re all at it

Despite the EU Court claiming that it’s an abuse of human rights for us to send migrants to Rwanda, the EU regime has no problem with doing it with surplus Africans. But it is 26-faced rather than the conventional two.

The lure of the freebie

Despite calling Rwanda an appalling place, Prince Charles has jetted off there to do some Commonwealth socializing. Let us hope all the gritting doesn’t do too much damage to the royal teeth!

The Usual Usual Story

If every trade union is going to throw a major wobbly and haul its members out on strike this summer, it’s going to be like an action replay of the worst Chinese plague lock-in.
    No danger, of course, when people start agitating about all those who die as a consequence of not getting medical treatment, that the unions with cop for the blame. Oh, no.

TV Peculiarity

There’s a TV channel called Scan-Ex? That’s what the continuity lady seems to be saying between episodes of Stargate SG-1. What she’s actually trying to say is ‘Sky Max’ – and failing miserably!

Lost for a reason?

Morcambe & Wise doing an IRA-supporting sketch for a guest who’s an Irish crooner on a Lost Tape?!?
    Good grief! They’d never get away with that today.

Something else pathetic

Is it news that the response of the Texas police, who hung about for an hour outside a school where a demented teen was perpetrating mass murder, was ‘inadequate’?
    Tell us something we don’t bloody know, why don’t you?

Make your own story up

You see all these headlines about something called SW19 and it’s difficult not to read it as Swig, which makes it look like an episode from the World Boozing Championships. Something more fun to be in than to watch.

Credibility Damage

Do we really need the BBC sending bods to Africa to record gorillas farting? What about all the pleas of poverty? They are obviously just routine garbage.

The Usual

What’s the rail strike all about? Trade unions trying to keep their membership and income up at the expense of everyone else by keeping people in non-jobs which should be ditched.

Bright Idea

Maybe Boris should invest in one of these AI systems which are supposed to be alive. If the taxpayer is coughing up for the electricity to run it, it’s affordable for him. And if it gets things hopelessly wrong, that’s down to the programmers, not Boris.

Get an AI

Sir Bier Starmer doing jokes? That sounds like another job for an AI system if that’s the best his scriptwriter and his drama coach can manage.

Rare Brazilian poison, indeed

The rather elderly Sergeant Dodds in McDonald & Dodds looks permanently surprised by the things he’s confronted with. Does that indicate that someone of his great age hasn’t been paying attention and that’s why he gets so many surprises?

Jobsworth

Does the PM really need an ethics advisor? He’s surrounded by them in Parliament. And in the media. And whoever gets the job is bound to be some Establishment figure at the end of a gilded career, who hasn’t been exposed to the real world.

Relax

When you see a front page headline telling you that Prince Wills is upset because his brother is an idiot, you can stop panicking because the papers haven’t found anything terrible to report.

Don’t fall off!

Bagnaia was on pole for 30 laps of MotoGP. After swapping the lead with Quateraro, he crashed at the start of lap 4! Nakagami had a big crash a few laps later.
    Miller eventually took 3rd from Espargaro with 3 to go. Zarco was a distant 2nd behind Quateraro at the finish.

Still making an effort

They certainly have some lengthy and inventive displays on the AEW wrestling shows. Was the WW ever like this in the good old days?
    How about that ladder match with tables as the main attraction! And what happened to the Hardys, who were supposed to be in it?

Very Racy

Sam Lowes was on pole for Moto2 and the early leader until Fernandez got frisky and disappeared into the distance. Acosta went 2nd with 14/28 laps to go after Lowes had a mid-corner bobble.
    Series leader Vietti crashed with 7 to do. Lowes went 2nd with 3 to go; briefly; twice. Schrotter got past Lowes for a podium place in his home race. Briefly. Lowes had a go but he couldn’t get past Acosta.

Sounds likely

“Why do Americans call something that’s a one-off a doozy?” someone asked the Mail’s guru. Could it be because they’re weird? I’d buy that for a dollar.

Attrition Corner

It was warm & windy for 27 laps of Moto3 in Germany. John McPhee was shunted into the gravel along with Rossi at turn one of the first lap by a bozo. More gravel flying on lap 5.A crash reduced the lead group to 7. Guevarra went off the front. Foggia or Garcia for 2nd? Garcia went past at the last corner but Foggia got on the gas first and rebagged 2nd.

Mindless Tripe

An 11% inflation warning can’t be a ‘shock’ as the headline would have us believe if the financial experts, real and self-appointed, have been going on about it for ages.

You can tell he’s dead

Using a cartoon of Albert Einstein in adverts for ‘smart’ meters is fraud and would be libel if Einstein were still alive as he would not fall for the accompanying fanciful message to the effect that these meters will save the planet from global warming.

No Great Loss?

The PM’s ethics bloke didn’t come across at all well in his TV interview last night. Very much a hum-yah type of person rather than decisive.
    He certainly doesn’t seem to get how deliberately obstructive the civil service can be. Boris looks better off without him.

Mind boggling again

CBD Support Joints (how cute) come in a box that looks like a cigarette packet in the advert I saw and it wasn’t until I read the small print that I found that the box contains capsules rather than cannabis joints to smoke.

Good News

I was encouraged to read that companies that go on diversity drives with a great fanfare of publicity & virtue-flagging don’t get the best ethnic minority campaigns; because they think they’ll be patronized; and shed their best white employees, who feel alienated.

Double Think

The Labour lot see nothing wrong with the railways at a standstill but they claim they’re not on the side of the strikers. Prince Charles thinks Rwanda is an appalling place to send migrants but he has no problem with going there for a Commonwealth jolly later this month.
    Spit the bones out of that lot!

More Dodginess

I’ve always felt it’s fraud to use the title of a classic novel like The Midwich Cuckoos and then admit on screen that someone else has been messing about with John Wyndham’s SF story. Just the title has been retained with a completely different story attached. Not on.

Foul, Ref!

Is it cross-fertilization or just nicking a good idea? I switched on for SG-1 dealing with the Ori invading through their supergate and there was Supergirl, at the end of the previous programme, watching a flood of spaceships zooming out of a much chunkier stargate.

Dodgy Lot

The thing you have to remember is that most of the people objecting to exporting migrants to Rwanda are either making money out of them or looking for something to be outraged about so they can make a nuisance of themself.

Nailed it

After watching two episodes of the cop show McDonald & Dodds with its spectacular views of Bath’s architectural triumphs, I can see a pattern.
    Detective Chief Inspector McDonald is stuck with a uniformed boss who is a total tosser and there is always a bad guy/gal on the inside of the police team.

Totally Fireproof

I see Putin the Poisoner has actually admitted that he’s trying to annex Ukraine because it was once part of the Soviet empire. Well, what’s a little truth if it can’t put you in a deeper hole than the one you’re in?

New one on me

Forget Stagflation, we now have Greedflation! Companies shoving prices up because they know they can. Such as the petrol companies.

No advert

You have to wonder how much culture there is in Bradford, which is the Capital of It for 2025, if it’s full of Moslems agitating over a film about Mohammed’s daughter. Sounds more like it was their turn rather than that Bradford has anything to offer in the way of a shining example of culture.

Situation Normal

Should we be surprised that there is one of those postcode lotteries for getting a 999 call answered? Not if the country isn’t a homogeneous mass with everything happened to the same extent everywhere.

Science? Really?

That Horizon programme about Pluto (a recent repeat) is a strange affair. It starts with the assumption that astronomers knew everything about the planet on the basis of images a few pixels big and some bigger guesses.
    So why would anyone be surprised by the pictures sent back by the New Horizons probe of a planet we’ve never seen properly?
    It makes as much sense as someone in a backwater village in England assuming they know everything about China without going there or meeting anyone Chinese.

Where does it all come from?

 There are a couple of houses nearby receiving building work and the sheer amount of stuff that’s disappearing into skips and vans is quite amazing. I have visions of the interiors being nothing but bare walls with just a few joists rather than a set of floorboards.

Just what they need

The government of New Zealand is going to tax farmers who have sheep & cattle because their animals emit greenhouse gases. Will that save the world form global warming? Not if the government does what all of them do – just blow the cash on something pointless.

Getting worser

The NHS website is going round the bend if it can’t use the word women in a context that applies only to females. Not even the daft variation womxn. If this is in line with best clinical evidence, we need a better clinic.
    No wonder the NHS is having to recruit people for non-jobs like diversity managers to keep the numbers up.

They don’t give up

I got an unexpected email about rescheduling a Royal Mail delivery this morning. When I moused over the link you’re supposed to click, I spotted that it went to somewhere in China.
    Delete, tout suite!

Spot them a mile off

You can tell who the Bremoaners in the Tory party are by their support for EU style voting on having confidence in the leader. The punters have to keep on doing it until the vote the right way, and then all voting stops and the issue is closed forever.

Unplanned Spin-off

Living well inland and on high ground is seeming a more and more sensible decision as the alleged Environment Agency gives up more on more on checking coastal erosion and building flood defences.
    Looks like the idiots running it won’t be satisfied until the nation is living on a few hilltops surrounded by swamps.
    But one big advantage of this, it has been pointed out, is that the legal vultures will go bust as the flood of economic migrants will end.
    Although the migrants will know they can’t be exported to Rwanda if the country is flooded and there are no airports, this also means there will be nowhere for them to park.

Lateral thinking

After the twit hired to advise the CPS decided that the word ‘woman’ should be cancelled in favour of ‘womxn’, some bright spark has gone the whole hog and suggested both ‘womXXn’ for real women and ‘womXYn’ for blokes in disguise!

Somewhat off target

Stick the logo anywhere time? The French airport strikers were putting the Black Lives slogan on their posters, which is hitting the pits of tokenism.

Weird Choice

The Meg (2018), a film about a monstrous creature that wrecks submarines, on the Comedy Channel? Not many laughs in that. All them tasty snacks @ the Japanese holiday beach! And our hero doing Cap’n Ahab on the shark. FIN.

No Room

Is there any point in demanding tougher action against airlines that cancel flights and don’t switch their customers to another carrier when there isn’t an alternative with spare capacity?

Erosion of trust

It’s rather a shame that we have an Environment Agency which seems to think its job is to preside of the disappearance of our environment. Apparently, doing anything about coastal erosion and providing effective flood defences is just too hard for this sorry gang to do anything about. So they’re just going to give up. But keep their fists in the taxpayer’s pocket.

Liberal with our cash

It’s all very well for the Church of Scotland to pretend that Rwanda isn’t a safe place to send economic migrants but are they going to pay for housing & feeding all these characters to give English taxpayers a break? No chance!

Alibi time

West End theatres are pretending they’re fairly empty because the transport system in London is always on strike. Nothing to do with the new stuff on offer is uninteresting except to very tiny minorites and the traditional stuff is hopelessly woke. And everything is ridiculously overpriced, or course.

Wot’s the excuse?

Is the architect of beergate basically a decent bloke? Not if he’s been outed as the person who incited the police to persecute Paul Gambaccini, Sir Cliff Richard et al on spurious sex charges in the wake of his failure to do anything about J. Savile.
    Which means that his failure to stick it to the Prime Minister after Boris won his confidence vote – by a greater margin than the one Starmer got in his leadership election – shows that Starmer is just a tedious lawyer with little contact with real life.

Great Idea

Not only should the government put a cap on the fines that cowboy parking operations stick on the unwary, the Chancellor can build up his popularity by sticking them with a windfall tax as well as the energy companies.

Risk-takers all

Despite all the warnings about damage to life expectancy, the staff of the Mansion seemed to have enjoyed the chance to go to YouTube to view the opening match of the CFL season, which proved that the Alouettes are no mugs and they very nearly beat the Stampeders in Calgary.

Hope wins over expectation

Never mind the people in queues at airports. You have to wonder about the sanity of people who queue up for a passport so they can join them!

One use for the internet

I was amused to read that the Russian airforce is having to resort to crowdfunding by its civilian fans because the regime doesn’t have the cash to provide basics like radios, torches, pilot's helmets & oxygen masks.

On Being Noticed

Tory leadership hopeful J. Hunt, who was a turkey as a minister, seems to be getting as big a kicking in the meeja as the PM. Would Oscar Wilde (reincarnated) suggest that it’s better to be noticed than totally ignored? Not with today’s gangs of trolls and ignorant peasants about.

Good news for some

Putin the Poisoner’s plans for invading Europe stop at Stonehenge after he’s crossed the Channel. Everyone living north of there can feel safe.

Well preserved

Watching an episode of Jonathan Creep last night (The Tailor’s Dummy), I was struck by how young Maureen Lipman, who was the bad gal, looked. Must have been the brightly tinted hair if the episode was made in MMIII.

Dicing with it

An hour sitting down in front of the TV knocks 14% off your live expectancy, I read. Sounds like doing it for 11 hours per week watching the new CFL season is going to make a date with the next Grey Cup final in November a real challenge.

The wrong way to do it

The Answers to Correspondents feature in the Daily Mail has told me where I’m going wrong.
    Studies have shown that most people hold a phone to their right ear, which is connected to the left side of the brain, which decodes language.
    But I pick up a phone with my left hand to leave the right free to write down messages. Silly me!

In another world

Just how many Russians does Putin plan to write off before he declares victory in Ukraine and retires to enjoy his stolen billions at his Black Sea palace?
    I suppose that’s the advantage of being in charge of a dictatorship with a veneer of democracy, even if it is via rigged elections. You can wreck the place to your heart’s content and no one can do a damn thing about it.

Things can only get worser

That’s the sad thing about the Tories. They have a history of discarding leaders who get useful things done and clinging on to the deadlegs. Not a problem for Labour. Every one of their leaders turns out to be a deadleg!

Doesn’t really add up

No one’s got any money for essentials and yet airports are crammed with people trying to go on holiday. I suppose it makes sense to someone. Not me, though.

No one’s buying it

The Tory leadership wannabe Jeremy Hunt, who was a total flop as a government minister, is being described as a pound shop Machiavelli. 99p too much?

Tough luck, mates

The BBC seems to be in mourning after the rotten Tories voted to keep Boris Johnson in the prime minister’s job. Upset because all their agitating came to nothing and they’re not as influential as they’d like to believe they are?

What about the climate crisis?

The Welsh are planning to put tons of surplus carbon dioxide into the atmosphere by resuming their campaign of setting fire to holiday homes, which deprive the natives of their right to access to the nation’s housing stock. And burning buildings to the ground doesn’t?

Counterblast

The Americans in charge of the oceans & the atmosphere are claiming that our species has never experienced the current levels of atmospheric carbon dioxide.
    But do they have any proof that it causes damage to humans? Of course, not. Because there isn’t any.

What to ask Sir Starmer

When he looks smug about the Tory leadership contest, the question is: Which is it? Is he a hypocritical liar or a lying hypocrite?
    And then ask him if he remembers that he got fewer votes than Boris in his leadership contest.

So much for sunny California

Wherever they made the film The Glimmer Man (1996) looks like a good place to avoid if you’re going to the States on holiday. It was chucking it down with rain constantly at the start of the film (drip tray needed under the TV?) and the place was full of demented serial killers.
    That’s L.A. off the holiday list after consulting the TV guide.

Point of View

If the experts are right and Mr. Musk is wrong, and it really is possible for people to do 5 days’ work in 4 days – for 5 days’ pay – then that suggests that the Workers of the World are a community of skivers and they’ve been getting away with it . . . forever!

Different Expectations

I was quite surprised to see the criminologist Edgar Lustgarten in colour last night in an episode of The Scales of Justice, which I thought was a 1960s black&white series.
    I was thinking it was a brilliant colourization job but after consulting the Wikipedia oracle, I found that I’d seen the last few minutes of the final episode of the 13, and the last 4 had been made in colour.

They don’t like it up ’em!

Mr. Musk of Tesla & SpaceX has an uncompromising view on the Shirk @ Home culture. If his minions don’t turn up at their office and put in at least 40 hours per week, they’ll be assumed to have resigned and be off the books.

Good News

Makes a change to get tome! The government expects to be able to keep the lights on during the coming winter. Which means that my secret nuclear reactor in the grounds of the Mansion won’t be over-worked.

Logical conclusion

The Scottish football team must be rubbish at the moment if they lost 3-1 to Ukraine but Wales, never footballing giants, beat them 1-0 to get into the World Cup finals.

Wot an ending!

A consort of viols performed the Spanish national anthem, which was different, before 24 laps of MotoGP. Nakagami got the blame for a massive crash early in lap 1. Quateraro went off the front. Bezzecchi crashed. Then Bastianini with 17 laps to go.
    DiGi went a lap later. “I don’t believe it!” Home team hero Espargaro started celebrating his second place at the beginning of the last lap! Which handed a distant 2nd place to Martin behind Quateraro. Eventually, Espargaro realized what he had done, started racing again and finished 5th.

Day off fatigue

Just as well we don’t have a D-Day Bank Holiday or some people would be trying for an excuse to have Tuesday & Wednesday off too to join up with the Jubilee Fest for a whole week off.
    Not something that bothers the railway unions, who seem to be on strike permanently.

Very lively race

Moto2 looked much the same at the start of the 22 laps; a long, unbroken line of riders with Roberts leading. A crash at the end of lap 3 opened a gap. Another on lap 5, and another. Lots of racing behind Roberts.
    Shockhorror! Roberts fell off in the lead with 12 to go!! Dixon vs Canet now. Pole man Vietti took both of them with 7 to go. Canet bit back. Sam Lowes crashed in 7th place with a couple of laps to go.
    Vietti took the lead, Canet went back ahead at the start of the last lap but Vietti got ahead again for the win.

Just a myth

Does anyone actually remember the previous Royal jubilee, 10 years ago? No one I’ve asked will admit having either memories or souvenirs. Which makes me wonder about all the stuff in the papers about it.
    Is it actual memories or is it just people delving into online archives in search of something to offer?

Catalunya Sunshine

Soggy wet here, sunny in Barcelona for today’s Moto3 race. Foggia was on pole for the 21 laps, needing a win, but his bike broke on lap 7, leaving his team mate, Suzuki, swapping the lead with Garcia.
    3 gone in a big crash with 13 to go, which split the field and left 7 leaders. Another gone a lap later. Suzuki couldn’t stay in the lead. Toba fell off in the lead group with 5 to go. Guevara went off the front for the win and Suzuki bagged 3rd to keep Garcia off the podium. McPhee was 7th.

Positive Improvisation

Nice to see standing-by firemen @ Edinburgh airport put on baggage handling duty when the place isn’t on fire. At least someone in Scotland can show some initiative. Pity the SNP government can’t do the same.

Idle hands

Why don’t government departments answer phone calls? Because the civil service is too busy concocting new genders to be bothered with the job it’s supposed to do. There are over a hundred of them now!

Might work

It has been suggested that the people who are moaning about being stuck at an airport for ages due to staff shortages should be privilege-shamed for being able to afford a holiday when others are struggling with the out-of-control cost of living.

More Malarky

If that Beery Starmer bloke has to resign over his biergate boozing in Durham, I read, it won’t make any difference. The Labour party will just stage a mock party leader election and he’ll be back confecting outrage in the Commons in no time.

Just try it, mate!

A viscount whose claim to fame is that he was a government advisor during the Thatcher years is campaigning for all pet cats to have to be muzzled when they go outdoors and they don’t have their staff with them.
    I can just see the Mansion cat; a rather feisty young lady; standing for his muzzle malarky. Not.

More reality

Another survey has found that GPs aren’t distributed equally round the country. Mainly because they are allowed to choose where they want to be and some areas, like the ones where the patients think it’s okay to get violent, are not that attractive.

Oh, really?

Are we really supposed to be impressed by someone in government service realizing that working at home increases carbon footprints if empty offices are still being heated and lit because the health & safety rules say they have to be? Which puts the spotlight back on the validity of worrying about carbon footprints if ours are as nothing compared to what’s happening in China, India, etc., in the way of carbon dioxide production.

Human Nature

Should we be surprised that some areas of the country have twice as many GPs as others? Not if we recognize that GPs are people who have preferences for where they live and they’re not mindless grey blobs, which are distributed randomly and equally everywhere. And they’re especially not going to want to be in areas where the customers get violent.

The ME! Syndrome

“Are Tory plotters so vain that they would risk catastrophe for Britain?” we were asked. Well, yes. They think they can get something for themselves out of the plotting and that’s all that matters.

No sugar, Shirley

The boss of the supermarket Sainsbury’s has seen fit to warn us that the costa living crisis will get worse before it get better.
    Doesn’t he think we know that? Or does he think we live in some parallel universe where things are different?

Another along in a minute?

‘Dumper’ Heard dumped on, the Wagatha Saga over – the legal trade must be in deep mourning until the next spat comes along.

Not very generous

“The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away”, we heard at the start of an episode of Murder, She Wrote, which makes the Lord an Indian giver, which is a Bad Thing. Or was before all references to Injuns were banned.

Give it a rest, LV

“Dom diddy . . .” stick him in front of a machine gun and keep pulling the trigger until there are no bullets left. Anywhere on the planet.

Not sold on it

The Bad Skin Clinic, which an advert was offering? What sort of weird wants to get bad skin?

Problem solved

Americans should be allowed to have as many guns as they can afford. But they shouldn’t be allowed to have bullets.

Small bonus

One advantage of the partygate BS-fest is that it has exposed the hissy no-hopers in the Tory party – the ones who are just making up the numbers and have nothing terribly useful to contribute.

None here, either

The Astronomer Royal has opined that masses of humans migrating to Mars is a dangerous delusion and that messing about with the planet’s climate would be a doddle in comparison. To which the only possible reply is: “We know, mate, we know!”

No cheers

Are we impressed by the governor of the Bank of England putting interest rates up four times if the rate is only 1% when inflation is over 11%? What sort of mugs does he think we are?