There’s a lot about

Then there’s the BBC ally proposing that the BBC should charge subscription fees on top of the licence fee, which it wastes so extravagantly.

Just as bad as Labour

That’s the obvious conclusion from the revelations that people living near the sites of proposed new wind farms are to be bribed with other taxpayers’ money to stop them objecting and people living near where a nuclear power station is proposed with get free electricity paid for by the taxpayer.

Incidental merriment

Sub-titles can be great fun. Like the one for the lady who was offered a drink in a bar in a Maigret episode called The Cactus. The sub-title was ‘a shot rose’, which was in keeping with the plant theme of the episode. What the lady actually got was a glass of green Chartreuse.

No one held to account, of course

How many people have been charged following the revelation that Shrewsbury & Telford Hospital NHS Trust killed 201 babies & 9 mothers over the last 20 years thanks to an obsession with natural birth?
    None?

Ancient history

Scorpio One (1997) – sabotage on an Earth orbit space station and the bad guys after a thin, square plastic case. How many modern newflakes are likely to recognize the primitive technology that was a 3½" floppy disk of negligible storage capacity in these gigabyte times?

Enough?

Will the possibility of something more extreme than Will Smith doing a slap to a wiseguy comic give the lacklustre Oscars a big TV audience next year?
    If so, how long will it be before they have to kill the wiseguy to get noticed?

Relax, all’s well

There can’t be much wrong with the world if the best whinge today’s paper can come up with is one about Prince Andrew looking after his mother at Prince Philip’s memorial service.

Even Weirder

Every file on a laptop in the corresponding directory had 1 hour added to the creation time, even those from before 31/10/2021. What the bloody hell is going on?

My turn to get lucky

One of the staff reported a scam call from a London number. Apparently, I am entitled to a refund of an overpayment of washing machine insurance and all I need to do is cough up my banking details.

Don’t bother

Female athletes are going to give up sport in despair if they know they have no chance against some post-teenage boy, who has suddenly decided he’s a girl.
    That’s the message I got from reading the Sunday Post. There certainly seems to be no point in getting up at 5 a.m. to do your swimming laps if there is no chance of fair competition and no medals on offer.

Brought to my attention

Files on a PC have a time stamp: the date & time from when a file was created or when it was last modified.
    Whenever I compared a directory on a PC with the backup versions on a flash drive, everything was identical up to last Sunday, when the clocks went forward an hour to BST.
    But suddenly, the creation time of every file on the PC was an hour later than the backup – going back to when BST ended last year on Sunday October 31st. Before that, everything matched. Weird.

One brain cell is working!

Watching an episode of Midsomer Murders, I noticed that CareCo is their sponsor – but they know that the channel is ITV3. Which makes calling Alibi ‘the Kalibuy’ all the weirder.

Goes around

That was a great story about the pushy cyclist who gets in the way of traffic to use his head-cam to shop drivers who are using a mobile phone.
    He’s been busted for obstructing traffic and he faces a fine of a grand! Oh, dear.

More splateral thinking

“Who would have a beard at this time of year when birds are looking for somewhere to next?” a wiseguy asks. If the bird is up to the job of negotiating a face mask, good luck to it!

Which is the greater stupidity?

Continuing to tell us there’s only one TV channel called Drama when no one would expect 2 channels with the same name? Or is it CareCo.com thinking the Alibi channel is called “the Kalibuy”?

Not a problem

If Jamaica wants to be independent from us and our Royal Family, let it. But no more British overseas aid as the Jamaicans will be expected to stand on their own feet.
    And if they want reparations for slavery, we’ll be happy to send our bill for all the civilizing they gained from contact with Britain and all the investments made there. To be paid first, of course.

Message to the world

Prince Bill didn’t have anything to do with the historic slave trade and he didn’t go to Africa to buy slaves from African kidnap gangs. Thus his apology is quite meaningless.

Not surprising

Why did it take 6 years to ransom Nazanin Ratcliffe from her Iranian kidnappers? Because politicians are basically useless. Mind you, she was a berk for being in Iran in the first place.

More hopeless hype

A Warhol picture of Marilyn Monroe is one of the greatest paintings of all time? What utter crap. It’s cute pop art but nothing wonderful and anyone who pays more than 150 million quid for it is a mug. End of.

Total Humiliation!

Putin the Poisoner is doing so badly with his attack on Ukraine that he’s had to hand over his treasured Public Enemy No. 1 status to our PM, Boris the Bold, leaving him a totally damaged despot. Shame.

More yawning

Is it possible for things like the Oscars to get more irrelevant to the real world? The favourite best film is about a deaf bloke. Not exactly something that will rattle the rafters but it’s the turn of deaf people to be patronized.

Too fragile

What is it about the Firefox browser that makes it fall over so often? I seem to be forever trying to stop it doing a complete reset and requiring an expert minion to reset it the way I want it. The alternative is Google but they do enough spying on us without using their Chrome browser too.

Tin can tangle

Where would the film industry be without nados? Like that daft Metal Tornado (2011) last night.
    Eats cars! Shame about the Eiffel Tower.

Hopeless Headline

“Warp speed for nuclear Britain”, said the headline. Read the story and it’s hold your breath until 2050.
    Warp speed, but not as we know it, Jim.

Accident, honest

It will be interesting to read how terrorist Ali Ali’s brief plans to explain how stabbing an MP 21 times during a constituency surgery isn’t murder. He just slipped and lost his balance with this bloody big knife in his hand?

More dodgy stats

If you believe the bods in Peking, more people died of the Chinese plague in Hong Kong than in the entire rest of China. That’s what you get from a Zero Strategy; a dodgy explanation for most deaths but some slipping through the net.

Another take

All that locking-in was misguided, is an opinion flying around now. It happened because deaths of people who didn’t have the Chinese plague were recorded of plague deaths and the fear-mongers were allowed to run riot.

Blame the bloke, not the job

According to Tony Blair, Putin the Poisoner started off as a decent bloke and a reformer. Who then went for the money and became a crazed warmonger. Sounds like a familiar story.

Probably the EU to blame

We live on an island surrounded by fish but chips shops are buying it from Russia, of all places? Just crazy.

Good idea

His former allies are going to arrange an ‘accidental’ poisoning for Putin the Poisoner? Can’t happen soon enough.

When we were in black & white

Inspector Maigret is a bit of an idiot, leaving a revolver on his mantlepiece for any casual visitor to nick. I blame that author bloke, Simenon.
    That’s something you don’t see any more, people wandering around puffing on a pipe.

Where he belongs

The portrait of Squeaker Berkow, with the blank space for the coat of arms for the peerage that never happened, is to be removed from pride of place in Speaker’s House and dumped in a dusty cellar with other unwanted artefacts.
    Shame he can’t be parked next to it.

Welcome revival

How long is it since I last watched xXx (2002)? Long enough to forget how funny it is. And how daft.

They’re all at it

Gordon Brown has joined the list of people with fantasies about Putin the Poisoner going before a war crimes tribunal. Strange the same didn’t happen to him for cheerleading Tony B. Liar’s illegal attack on Iraq in 2003.

A wokewash too far

The Swansea National Waterfront Museum has felt the need to remind visitors to an exhibition about the first ever steam locomotive that steam engines were used by the slave trade.
    How stoopid can you get? I doubt this is the stoopidest.

Worthwhile Wisdom

“Do you know your way around a laboratory?”
    “Yes, the trick is to use the aisles between and around the work benches instead of trying to climb over them.”

No Excuse

Don’t you just hate it when bloody Windows copies something other than the bit of text you’ve just blocked? Should be worth a $10 fine out of Bill’s bank account for every time it happens.

Thieves is as thieves does

When Russian troops mug civilians in Ukraine for anything valuable and loot their homes and supermarkets, they’re just following a commandment from the Kremlin to be self-sufficient.
    Try telling that to the war crimes commission.

Wellies on!

Just 20 wet laps for the MotoGP riders. No Marc Marquez; he was in hospital after another bad crash. Olivera took the lead from Miller and stayed there. Dramatic wobbles and crashes behind them. Zarco moved up to 3rd and Quateraro, the current champ, finished 2nd.

Yes, it’s pathetic

Another lady columnist moaning about some celeb playing fast & loose with her privacy (the celeb’s).
    If the celeb upsets you so much, dearie, write a page about something else and leave her ignored & miffed.

Dark Skies

Tyres were an issue for the Moto2 race, which was cut from 25 to 16 laps on weather issues. A spot of rain on a circuit camera at the start with Sam Lowes on the front row?
    Lots of early barging past. Big black clouds looming! There was some rain and lap times dropping with 11 laps to go but no one wanted to quit.
    Lowes dropped down to 4th, being cautious, and Thai rider Chantra scored his first ever win.

Week 2 in Indonesia

The commentators were at full chat for the Moto3 race. First crashes on lap 2/23. Get off the racing line and you’re in real trouble on this brand new track.
    It was always Foggia’s race and all the interesting stuff went on behind him. Last lap crashes shuffled the pack even more.

Also Russian

They were really struggling to come up with a reason why the Russian cosmonauts newly arrived at the ISS were wearing yellow overalls.
    Nothing to do with Ukraine. Oh, no! Of course not.

Surprise!

I thought the fake Russian meerkats in those adverts had been banned because of the Russian assault on Ukraine. Not on ITV, they haven’t.

I suppose they have to go on about something . . .

“You can’t turn the telly on without coming across yet another home makeover or property search programme,” claims a lady columnist. Oh, yes, you can. If you live in the real world. Bang goes another bogus generalization.

Clunk

Russia killing people in Ukraine is ‘unacceptable’. P&O sacking 800 staff is ‘wholly unacceptable’. We seem to have a sense of proportion failure at the cliché factory.

They’re all at it

A Royal visit to the Caribbean falls foul of local racialists? You just can’t get foreigners with manners any more.

Not that bloody fantastic

At the end of the 2015 film The Fantastic Four, the gang had a box around their number. Is there a box around Putrid the Poisoner’s Z to make us think being Z-list is Fantastic?

Stands out a mile

I have to agree with all those who think doing a play based on the Cyrano de Bergerac story without the nose is like doing Quasimodo without the hump and Long John Silver with both legs intact. Wokewash.

Doggerelly

I was offered a Clerihew associated with the 1970 film The Vampire Lovers, which was on the box the other night; even if it’s more like a shallow drawer than a box these days:
    “Ingrid Pitt’s known for her tits,
    “Which were put on show to earn her dough.”
p.s. It wasn’t a proper Hammer film. Michael Ripper wasn’t in it.

More fantasies

“Contact your GP service”, TV ads keep urging us. But given the state of the NHS now and the shambles New Labour made of general practice, it should be compulsory to add: “For all the good it will do you” as a prominent on-screen caveat.

Fantasy land

There is a peculiar notion going around that people get their news only from social media sites, and that their algorithms could censor legit stories, leading to widespread ignorance of the true state of affairs.
    Anyone who can access social meeja can also access real news sites on the internet. If they choose to. And if they don’t, there’s nothing to be done about their decision to wallow in ignorance.

Got there eventually

Seattle Superstorm (2021) is a rip-off of The Quatermass Experiment, it took me ages to realize.

Not convinced

“I believe that . . .” a bloke tells us in a TV advert for something or other. Find, but what if he’s a total idiot who’d believe anything he’s told? Especially if cash is involved. Where is the guarantee of credibility?
    Still on the subject of credibility; CareCo is still doing deadly damage to its credibility by still cluelessly calling the Alibi TV channel ‘the Kalibuy’.

Forlorn hope

A bloke complained in the paper that he can’t understand how plastic PPE can go out of date and need to be burnt, at great waste of taxpayers’ cash.
    It’s the NHS and the government, mate. So don’t expect it to make sense.

Response – bafflement

With age doesn’t come wisdom in some cases. Serial agitator Peter Thatchell is surprised that fellow lefties O.J. Corbyn and Diane ‘abacus’ Abbott are spouting the Kremlin line about Putin’s attack on Ukraine.
    But what else does he expect from the looney left? He’s spent five decades in their midst. Has he learnt nothing?

History is not an educative process

“If we don’t end war, war will end us.” A quote from Things To Come – the 1936 film of the book by H.G. Wells, which I watched on DVD last night.
    “I want to make victorious peace,” says the Boss Man in a pre-echo of Putin the Poisoner.
    And then we have the selfish bastard tendency yelling. “Stop this progress before it is too late!” just before the comic opera giant space gun is fired.
    Nothing much ever changes.

Goes a bit further

Mad Mandy also takes a pop at a bloke for making some event all about him to the exclusion of everyone else.
    Pot, Kettle, Mandy!

Get with it, mate!

“Please don’t make things even worse,” a newspaper pundit tells the Chancellor. Despite his great age, the pundit clearly hasn’t learnt that making things worser is what politicians are for.
    Especially if the Chancellor’s spiritual pronouns are Gordon & Brown.

Goes around

Mad Mandy of the Mail misquotes a bloke as an excuse for taking a pop at his looks. Which gives the rest of us a licence to notice she’s no oil painting herself!

Brilliant idea

In the film Putinado (2022), someone needs to blow up the mad dictator in the same way that the Stonado in the earlier film was cancelled.

Pragmatists say no chance!

“The crimes of Vladimir Putin cannot, will not, go unpunished” yelled the headline.
    Wrong on both counts.
    Russia is not subject to truth, honesty, decency and the ways of civilized society.
    Get used to it.

Off target

That ice-bomb hurling monster in the film Stonados (2013) should have been aimed at Moscow and Putrid the Poisoner instead of bits of the USA!

Not us, matie

It’s fashionable now to claim that Putin killing people all over the world is somehow our fault. What bollocks. He’s a mad, bad bastard. Everyone knows it. We didn’t put him where he is today,     that was the criminals running Russia.
    All the blame is 100% theirs and none is ours.
    So all you bleeding heart liberals can go and bleed on someone else. We’re having none of your contrivances. With the emphasis on the ‘con’.

Further to the Fs . . .

“Why don’t you fall on the floor, you bastard?” is also very popular with those in their 8th decade as they’re picking up something perverse and unco-operative.

Not much in it

Which is worse – an ITV show that did the human equivalent of bear-baiting or Channel 4 digging it all up again to wave virtue flags? Apparently, it was baiting of commoners despised by the metropolitan looney lefties, which made it all right. No doubt they will be giving Channel 4 an audience.

Typical

The Chinese are denying that Russia has asked them for economic & military aid as the assault on Ukraine continues to fail and calling it fake news. But that doesn’t seem to prevent the Chinese from spreading other fake news from Russia, especially if it lets them have a go at their enemies in Europe & America.

Not worth it

About the only positive from Putin the Poisoner’s assault on Ukraine is that it has switched off the likes of Wee Burney Sturgeon, the Doctors of Doom and that Starmer bloke. Not a price any moral person would have volunteered to pay.

Reap, sow, like that

I see British Gas is getting the blame for not giving credit balance refunds to customers forced onto its books by failed energy companies. Not having had any cash from the failures doesn’t seem to impress anyone when something as awful in the way of customer service as BG is concerned.

More power to the elbow

Let us hope that Nigel Farage has the same success in grotting all over the Net Zero scam as he had with demolishing the Bremoaners. He’s probably the only politician worth having!

Not impressed

It’s amazing how quickly virtue flags can become negatives. If everyone is claiming in TV ads to be the ‘proud sponsor’ of something or other, it becomes just a mindless cliché and using it demonstrates an obvious lack of sincerity as well as originality.
    ‘Proud’ is now as contemptible as a government department or politician claiming the minions are ‘working hard’.

F-f-f-frequency

One of my correspondents has come up with an interesting theory: the use of the F-word aloud is a good measure of age. If you feel the need to deploy it more than 20 times in an average day, you’re probably in your 70s or a young punk.

Rank bad planning

Isn’t it a shame that most of the world’s oil is under places like the ones run by Putrid the Poisoner and the Crown Prince who has journalists hacked to pieces in his Turkish consulate?

Can’t be said often enough

Vald Putin needs shootin’,
In the back of his head till he’s good bad and dead.

Boggle, boggle

A bloke who’s claimed to be thinking about bidding for Chelski FC is reported to be thinking about spending £1.5 BILLION on a new stadium.
    That’s one thousand five hundred MILLION quid. For what? Gold-plated seats? Gold-plated plastic grass on the pitch. The mind boggles into orbit.

Thanks for that

Lloyds Bank is doing me the favour of putting the interest rate for my credit card up by 4%. That’s a pretty Putin way of being ‘on your side’.
    No danger of a similarly vigorous bump in savings rates, though.

Time goes by

It must make the visual continuity difficult when the Bourne in Friday’s film would be a decade older than he was in Tuesday’s. One solution is not to have him in the film – just chuck the Bourne name around for 3 hours with the adverts.
    Same old, same old motorbike chase at the end.

Telling silence

How strange that Greenhouse Greta and all the other Pocket Putins haven’t been staging protest marches in Moscow against all the extra carbon dioxide that the criminal assault on Ukraine is putting into the atmosphere.

First Rule of Warfare

The longer the war goes on

and the more his forces struggle against weaker opposition,

the more pathetic the aggressor’s lies and excuses become.

How long?

Russia to remain a pariah state for how long?
    Until all of the damage to Ukraine has been paid for and repaired?
    Until all the refugees are back in their homes?
    Until all the war criminals have been tried, convicted and gaoled?
    Until Putin is dead?
    For the rest of eternity?

Another mystery

‘Proud sponsors of unforgettable moments on Alibi’ is what the on-screen caption says when the ad-break ends.
    So why does the voice-over woman render ‘Alibi’ as something that sounds like ‘the Kalibuy’? Makes zero sense.

Not really helping

“Where do we start drilling for the oil & gas we need?” asks some comedian, “outside your front door?”
    Somewhere with the right geology would be the right place to start. But try telling that to a wiseguy.

That other theory

Putin is just plain bad, he’s always been like that but leaders in the West haven’t been able to get their heads around that.

Weird

In the Jason Bourne film No. 2, the optional TV subtitles were adding what people were saying in Russian when the film makers didn’t bother to add a translation, but they offering the Russian words rendered in our alphabet!
    So we got things like ‘poshli’ for ‘let’s go’ instead of an English translation. I wonder who decided that an English audience would be able to cope with Russian words.

Bookmarked

We have to wait until June for the CFL season to start. Rats! Let us hope Putin the Poisoner is history by then. Or back in his box with the rest of the mad frogs, at least.

And finally

The MotoGP race was under the floodlights. How long would Marc Marquez stay second? Back to 3rd behind Brad Binder with 17/22 laps to go. There was a spectacular crash with 11 to go.
    The self-styled Beast with the distinctive pit board blagged the lead on lap 19 and stayed there ahead of Binder. Marquez was 5th on what’s not a Honda track.

A British triumph

An early crash in the Moto2 race was unusual. The British guy was in 6th place at the time and described a SLow on the chart of racers, which is a fine example of an accidental insult as he banged in a fastest lap.
    SLow was the tail-end charlie of a leading group with 5 laps to go. A collision ahead of them sent Fernandez zooming off the track and put Sam Lowes on the podium in 3rd. Hooray!

All his fault

Putin the Poisoner’s war is claiming the world’s attention. Which explains why I didn’t notice that MotoGP is back until Monday and why I ended up not watching the 3 races @ Qatar until yesterday.
    Still guys whizzing off the track in Moto3. A world record three of them doing a long lap at the same time! Stay off the dusty bits! A modest 5th place for the British guy.

Diagnosis @ a distance

Putin is out of his mind because of all the steroids he’s taking and that’s why he’s so puffed up and he won’t let people close to him so they can see how puffed up.
    Putin has terminal cancer and he’s taking his revenge on the world while he can.
    No doubt there will be another theory along in a minute.

One way to get rich

Buy a football club for £140 million and put it up for sale a few years later for £3 BILLION!

Not impressed

Drilling for more of the oil off our shores is a good idea and not something that should have been binned. But pretending that it will do anything to stabilize current oil prices is as daft as, well, a firenado.

Not much sympathy going

More mixed reality in the paper – some woman complaining about her husband’s affair destroying her life next to Putin the Poisoner’s troops shelling civilians in Ukraine.

Totally boggling

You thought that the Sharnado films were daft? How about the firenado created by homicidal environmentalist nutters in Fire Twister (2014).
    Daft as a whole warehouse full of brushes.

Worth watching

I got round to watching a recording of the ITV serial based loosely on Len Deighton’s book The Ipcress File last night; the recording allows me to whizz through the ad breaks.
    My impression is that it’s well done, good script, the kid playing Harry Palmer has the right level of attitude and I’ll be watching the rest.

Good idea

Sanctions for the Putin-supporting useful idiots running the RMT union and bringing London to a stand-still? I’d vote for that.

Not joined up either

I see SAGE, the confederation of Chinese plague doom merchants, has been slipped into the bin of history. The so-called scientists got their predictions so wildly wrong because they failed to anticipate that people would adapt to changing conditions. That’s how brilliant they were at forecasting.

Mind successfully boggled

If you ever need your sense of reality disrupted, just open a newspaper and gaze at Putrid the Poisoner doing an insane rant on the left page and a formula for the allegedly perfect chip buttie on the right page. Not joined up, just like real life.

Shame

Despite a record snowfall, Scotland is nowhere near close to reaching last year’s total for avalanches. All the restrictions for the Chinese plague have kept skiers and other avalanche triggers at home. Better luck next year!

Looking the other way

The alibis are slotting in to place already. Apparently the rest of what passes for Putin’s Cabinet haven’t been told the full extent of what’s going on in Ukraine and they’re too scared to ask in case they end up in a concentration camp in Siberia.

Bye-ee

We all have to make sacrifices but giving up the allegedly Russian meerkats in the TV adverts is no biggie.

Bad as Putin

Roman Rains & gang on WW SmackDown? Yawn. Quick, where’s the fast-fast-fast forward button?
    I think I’m going to give up the WW as too much hassle. I seem to spend more time fast-forwarding through boring bits than watching.

Wonderful planning

That Soviet convoy that’s been menacing Kiev like forever turns out to be going nowhere because it’s stuck in the mud. What military genius arranged that?

Recycle!

Watching an episode of UFO last night, I was interested to see a version of Thunderbird 2 used to retrieve in mid-air, a spacecraft descending through the atmosphere at the end of a trip from the Moon for a landing on Earth.
    Is that where the creator of Mr. Branson’s space operation got his inspiration?

Not wanted on voyage

Chunky Munky Punk doing a rant on AEW? Fast forward. Joined by the bloke in the fake tartan scarf? Go to double fast forward.

Brilliant invention

Did I really see an advert for a camera that lets you erase inconvenient other people from photographs? How very communist & Russian.

Luddite Lament

A bloke was moaning in the paper that E.on offers better deals online and discriminates against people who won’t use computers.
    But what it really does is reflect the lower cost of dealing with people using software rather than expensive humans. As simple as that.

Lots of fun

If you run out of something to do at Easter, you can always try sticking a hot cross bun that’s dripping with cheese or chocolate into a toaster and watching the whole lot go up in flames.
    And then stick the video on You-Tube.

English is everywhere

I was rather puzzled by this Ukrainian street sign:

Until I realized it has to be STOP in Cyrillic rather than either the Ukrainian or Russian equivalent of our word.
    Nothing like making life needlessly complicated.

Nutter

What sort of brain-dead bozo sends his army to shell a nuclear power plant in a neighbouring state?
    All we need is one friend of humanity with one small bullet in one small gun.

Woooo!

No doubt the people of Ukraine are overjoyed to know that Prince Hairy & consort are standing by them; all the way away in sunny California.

Attention grabber

No doubt all the people involved in China’s winter Paralympics are wishing Putin the Poisoner would drop dead and stop deflecting attention away from their big moments.

Infinite amounts of dosh to blow

The Metropolitan police have included the Chancellor, the Home Secretary & the Health Secretary in their pointless pootling over Downing Street parties years ago in the interests of diversity. That’s what it looks like, anyway.

Thanks for that

As if we didn’t have enough to make us miserable, the UN’s gang of global warming swindlers have come up with another of their doomy message. The gist is that we’re doomed now but that’s no reason to stop shoving cash into the paws of the swindlers.

An Epitaph

Valdimir Pootin was in need of shootin’,
In the back of the head till he was dead.

Natural force

Eruption: LA (2018) got another outing on one of the Great! Movies channels last night and suggested that what we need to do is trigger a similar earthquake under Moscow. That would give Putin the Poisoner something else to think about other than invading his neighbours.

Essential Now

People who have a cat are better able to cope with the stresses of life, some academic reckons.
    Sounds like something every motorist needs!

Jobs for life and a bit more

If the MPs and peers won’t move out of the Palace of Westminster, the repair & restoration work will end up going on for the rest of this century. Jobs for life for the builders, etc. As long as the government doesn’t shove the pension age up to 80.

Inevitable?

Forget all that garbage about some sort of psychological barrier for petrol at 150p/litre. Looks like it’s heading for 160p/litre quite effortlessly before the month is out.

He’s Delusional

Let’s face it, the only Nazis around at the moment live in Putinstan between Putin the Poisoner’s ears.

Not as pointless as it looks

If you see a cat chasing something invisible on a smooth floor; not one with a carpet; it could be a cat coyote – a flimsy wad of cat hair which has accumulated somewhere and been blown into circulation by a sudden draught.

Thought for the day

Now would be a good time to dash out and buy some roubles. You get about 140 of them to the pound instead of 100.

M*A*S*H Thought

If you’re giving someone 600,000 units of penicillin ever hour, wouldn’t it make sense to redefine the size of the unit and get shot of a few zeros? Especially for written instructions.

Arrant passing off

Planet Dune (2021) shares a word in common with the title of Frank Herbert’s novel but that’s all. And the plot is a joke. The rescue crew didn’t know about the worms? No fremen?

Tosh

I came across some extraordinary panic-mongering and blame-buggering by Sarah Vine in the Mail, who would have us believe everyone she knows is absolutely terrified of being invaded by Putin the Pillock.
    Sounds like she’s from the same planet as Dippy Vlad.