Ghosts!

The BBC seems to be getting into A.I. as the way ahead. First, a series of lectures fronted by an A.I. Agatha Christie. Now, they plan to do something with the much more recognizable image of Alfred Hitchcock.

Only sometimes?

The government is on the side of working people, right? So why is the Transport Secretary going to stick it to them by getting rid of the £3 cap on bus fares?

Another bogus

The latest bogus human rights, if Those People are allowed to get away with it, will be a right of access to the internet and then a right to get TV on the internet.
    Predictably, the response from academics who have found that kids are being damaged by excessive internet access is sceptical. But since when did good sense have anything to do with bogus human rights?

Back down to Earth

The response to the Farage Reform agenda from the Conservative Shadow Chancellor has been to calculate that Reform’s tax giveaways would bankrupt Britain!
    No sign of the fourth party that will save us from the first three yet?

Impossible dream

Combine Farage’s ideas with those of sidelined Boris Johnson, and we’d really go places. But like that would ever happen.

Major challenge

After reading Nigel Farage’s Saturday essay about what his party is about and what his concerns are, the only possible response is a big yes to all of it.
    But could Nige deliver against the dead negative hand of the Blob in the civil service?

Sneaky

The reason why Chinese electric vehicles are relatively cheap is that they have a hidden kill switch in them, which would let ‘bad actors’ bring them to a standstill at a time when they are intent on mischief.
    That’s the story, anyway. How true it is depends on how much you subscribe to the theory that the purpose of new tech is to screw up the lives of people still using older tech.

Bound to happen

Bets are being laid on when Reform UK, currently the refuge of the protester, will become as reviled and the Conservatives and Labour, and people will be rushing to vote for another bunch of upstarts and not-the-establishment.

Leaky Britain

We’re heading for a summer drought and all that goes with it; hosepipe bans, low water pressure and so on.
    So why aren’t the water companies getting a good and continuous battering to get on with fixing the leaks in the distribution system, which allow so much of it to go to waste?

Worst people in the world?

Are lawyers totally disconnected from truth, decency and the British way of life?
    Is that why the one who’s our prime minister can quite casually give away the intellectual property of the country’s creative sector to Big Tech in the USA without charge and not think the move should never even have been contemplated?

Very small teacup

Is it really a ‘Hitler storm’ if a Labour MP gets the hump with a posting by a Reform councillor to the effect that it’s a good thing that no one suggested to Adolf Hitler that he should invade us using small boats?
    Or is it just a Labour MP being pathetic and needing to grow up into the real world?
    Or is there a ‘get Reform for being successful’ trend in progress?

How amazing!

Got a good laugh from Tom Utley of the Daily Mail, who found that Google’s A.I. thinks his niece is both his mother and his grandmother.
    Definitely artificial intelligence and no substitute for the real thing.

A man with history

I gather the new Pope is a Yank. That must have really chuffed the Africans who think it’s their turn. A surprisingly young bloke; a mere 69; with a history of not being too worried about child abuse by priests.

Why would it?

What a totally daft idea – Mad Max Verstappen telling people that becoming a dad didn’t make him a slower Formula One driver. No, mate, especially with your wife, your staff and relatives doing all the work.

Long term solution

San Quentin State Prison houses a bloke who was convicted of killing 16 men back in 1989 and sentenced to death.
    He is now 80. Was that by death by old age rather than something like a gas chamber or a lethal injection?

Trade surprise (to me)

Where do 50% of Scotch whisky exports go? India! Mind you, there are rather a lot of them and the place is prosperous in parts.

Real speedy

I gather they elected another Pope whilst I was otherwise engaged. A real Speedy Gonzalez job?
    I bet they’re still messing about with electing a new Archbishop of Canterbury at this time next year.

Another of life’s big mysteries

Fat women spraying sweaty armpits. Why is that appropriate teatime TV advertising?

Good for him

Bravo to Prime Minister Carney of Canada for telling President Trump where to get off and that Canada ain’t going to become the 51st state of the United States.
    CFL fans at the Mansion would be totally outraged if a Trump take-over led to a forced merger of the excellent Canadian Football League with the much less adventurous NFL in the States.

Good for them

Nice to see the newly elected Reform UK councillors refusing to waste time by being shoved onto a propaganda course about climate change or diversity.

If Only

Nothing like a spot of nuclear sabre rattling by Pakistan and India to make stranded traveller wish they’d just bloody get on with it and it would go global!

Going nowhere

I’ve been stuck in one of those travel shambles, where you sit around for hours and hours and hours and nothing bloody happens.
    I feel the need for a couple of days off to recover!

No Taste

You don’t need a fashion sense if you’re a popstar. That’s the message from the one who was strolling around New York in a sheer dress to show off the logo on her underwear.

Not exactly joined up

The Chancellor’s VAT raid on private schools was advertised as funding 6,000 more teachers in the public sector. The next thing you know, the Schools Minister is talking about teacher redundancies. That was a pretty big bump in the road.

Confidence builder – not!

There are junior doctors who are condemning the Supreme Sourt ruling on what a woman is with a claim that this is biological nonsense. Who’d want to be treated by one of these idiots?

Keep them guessing

President Trump was making noises about running for a third term, even though that’s constitutionally impossible. There was a strong hint that he was hoping for popular acclaim.
    But reality has bitten and he’s not going to do it.

More than likely

If the lights go out due to Edstone Milipede’s wilful failure to ensure constancy of the electrical supply, someone observed, then that will give Beer Smarmer another excuse for failing to sack the useless bugger – he won’t be able to find him!

Could be true

Apparently, some experts think Reform UK won the Runcorn by-election by only six votes because our prime minister didn’t go there during the election campaign.
    The feeling is that the result would have been a landslide for Reform UK if Uncle Beer had dared to show his ugly mug!

Get rid

A judge who has the full make-over from make to female is off to the European Court of Human Rights to complain about the Supreme Court ruling on biological sex.
    It’s definitely time to bin the ECHR, which has turned out to be a major time and money waster here.

News or olds?

Is it still news that the Chancellor is being investigated by the watchdog at Westminster over another of her freebies?
    Or do we just accept that’s the way things are going to be for the rest of her term in office?

Free will needed?

 The pensions industry is reported to be worried about people accessing their pension pot to use the cash for gambling and wants to quiz people about their gambling habits when they apply for cash.
    The Open Rights Group reckons asking people about their gambling is intrusive & could affect their credit rating adversely.

Silence recommended

There are reports of some junior doctors condemning the Supreme Court ruling that a woman is defined by biological sex. They claim this is biological nonsense!
    Which leaves me wondering why they didn’t keep their traps shut. After all, who’s going to have any confidence in them if they can’t handle basic biology?

Man with a plan

The Environment Secretary wants to confiscate and crush vehicles used by fly-tippers and impose the cost on them instead of leaving the local council stuck with it.
    Nice to see a member of this government getting serious about a problem.

Just silly

Trigger warnings are supposed to go on material which the audience might not have encountered before. But the National Theatre has plastered them all over an upcoming production of Hamlet which is ridiculous, tiresome and infantile.

Just Shameless

You’d think a Cardinal who’d been gaoled for five and a half years by the Vatican court, and who isn’t eligible to pick the next pope, would sit on the sidelines quietly.
    But not the one Pope Francis told not to get involved. He’s using his exclusion as an excuse for going around yelling he’s innocent.

After Beer!

There’s a growing amount of support for the current Health Secretary as a successor to Beer Smarmer. Mainly because he has a personality; something which is totally absent in Beer’s empty suit; and he can be quite sensible when he tries.

Phone Guinness!

Our wonderful government is setting a new world record for losing support faster than any previous newly-elected government in the whole history of the universe.

Quite a change

At the general election, it was Vote Farage, Get Labour.
    Nigel seems to have cashed in to the max on an unpopular Labour government, one which is setting new world records for being useless at everything.
    But can Nigel deliver now?

Bound to fail

The major power blackout across Spain and Portugal was due to a failure of the juggling act with occasional sources of power to adjust to demand. Proper power stations provide a generous amount of slack in the system and offer energy reliability. The sort of system Labour is going for doesn’t.

No to the lot of them!

Pollsters out before this week’s local elections found that when presented with a list of the major parties, 41% came back with ‘none of the above’ as their choice.
    And 43% didn’t trust any of the major parties to sort out the financial problems created by local government incompetents.

Feet are for dragging

The Treasury is claiming it is bringing new rules on debanking into force in response to what happened to Nigel Farage at the hands of Coutts. But that was a couple of years ago and the new regs won’t come into effect until next year.
    Two speeds; dead slow and stop.

How important are local elections?

Not terrifically, has to be the conclusion after there were no riots in the areas which didn’t have any due to Angela Rayner’s gerrymandering.

Quite Insane

That has to be the verdict on the Cambridge University Polar Museum’s operators, who would have us believe that exploring Antarctica was an act of colonialism, even though no one lived there at the time.

Huh?

What was up with GB Views the other night? I switched on just before 8 p.m. for the State of the Nation programme and the news summary.
    12 minutes later, they were still going through the stock of plugs and promos with no explanation for what had gone wrong.
    So I pulled the plug on them in disgust.

Real Retro

Looking for an expensive gift for someone? An American company is using Tyrannosaurus to cook up an artificial fabric which will have the texture of T-Rex skin and can be used to make gloves, etc.
    And if anyone complains that whatever they’ve bought doesn’t feel like dinosaur skin, they’ll just be confronted with “How do you know?”

Inability to focus?

Our Chancellor headed for the United States to do something about a trade deal. Next thing you know, she’s being reported as telling all sorts of people that Uncle Beer is much more interested in a deal with the EU. That’s going to do wonders for her chances of a deal.

Enjoy it while you can

We’re having a rather lengthy period of sunny weather. Not something we can look forward to the future if the climate spivs get their way and start blocking our sunlight in a futile attempt to change the climate.

Suspend judgement

Trump’s first 100 days in office, a political milestone or a millstone?
    I suppose we’d better wait a while before we decide if he’s rewriting the script constantly.
    Ending the war in Ukraine in a day? That’s now a joke. And not a brilliant one.

Weird Decision

Our Home Sec. thinks it’s a good idea to let an Islamist hate preacher do a tour of the country and tell his audiences that cutting hands off is a good idea.
    No explanation for why it’s such a good idea on offer.

Pie literally in the sky

The Aria sun-blocking scheme to prevent global warming seems to be getting a lot of derision from actual climate experts. The bloke in charge, who got a £50 million sub from Beer Smarmer, isn’t one, of course.
    All we have to do is be patient until the millions of coal-fired power stations are closed down and the problem just goes away. We certainly don’t want to be paying for the hobby horses of the likes of the Aria bloke.

It works!

One of the first things our wonderful prime minister did was bin the Rwanda plan for exporting undesirables because it wasn’t his idea and he wasn’t bothered about wasting the billion on so pounds which had already been spent on setting it up.
    Next things you know, President Trump is using Rwanda as a dumping ground for the likes of terrorists, whom the courts won’t return to their country of origin because it might be dangerous for them, poor things.

Not me!

Only someone like Edstone Milipede could offer turning energy pricing into a postcode lottery as The Next Big Thing. And then go into a shower of indignation when he claims he never had anything to do with the idea and no one believes him.

Get Rid

They should shove the vandals who were tossing red power around at the London Marathon in gaol for a couple of years.
    They they should stick them at the top of Mr. Farage’s list of undesirable scumbags.
    We definitely don’t need characters like that swanning around.

How civil is this service?

Someone needs to work out how much of a world record is being set by all the obstructing of payments to victims of the Post Office Horizon.
    And then the foot-draggers should all be done for misconduct in a public office, based on the information gathered, and have their fat pension confiscated.

Don’t call me that!

Looking at the list of boy’s names which have dropped out of fashion by anything from 90% to 88% between 2013 and 2023, you have to wonder what sort of plonker calls their kid Leland or Bartolsz or Mateusz.
    Nicola is down 93% in the list of girl’s names. Obviously, the Sturgeon factor!

Pull the other one

“Reeves fights fiscal storm” is rather a joke as a headline. The abundant evidence tells us she can create a fiscal storm but as for fighting one – forget it!

Anon, Anon

It’s rather telling that some of the women who are demanding extra rights for trans people at the expense of actual women felt obliged to wear a Chinese plague mask in their demos.
    Just like the Hamas supporters, they don’t want to be identifed and challenged.

Incredible

Prison officers shouldn’t wear stab vests, some screwball reckons, because it ‘militarizes’ prisons and creates an environment which is traumatizing for the prisoners.
    Even the ones who are nasty bastards who are in there for life?
    You’d have to be really desperate to come up with a tale that pathetic.

Included Out

Was it a crime against humanity that I didn’t watch the Pope’s funeral on TV, not being interested in religion?
    Or are there still a few threads of free will flying around to make it okay?

No one is safe

Something to remember when the 80th anniversary of VE-Day arrives next month – our wonderful Chancellor is going to cancel the tax break firms which employ Armed Forces veterans get if she gets her accounts into an even bigger tangle.

Peacemaker? Joke!

The very last person you’d want making a peace deal for you is Donald Trump. Especially when he’s doing his double attack-dog routine with his vice president.
    “Give up a fifth of your country to the guy who attacked you or we walk away.”
    “Oh, yes, and we want your minerals. And we want your nuclear power station so we can use it to sell power to Russia.”

Just an attention-seeker

“Why shouldn’t I have an opinion?” says gary bloody lineker.
    “Why can’t you keep it to yourself if it’s deliberately intended to cause offence?” say the rest of us.

It’s all relative

One way to make America look great again is to trash the global economy so that America standing still looks better than the trashed rivals

Can you believe him?

Given his record for telling blatant lies, how sincere is the PM’s acceptance of the Supreme Court ruling on what a woman is? Does he really believe it or is he just saying it because it is now politically expedient?

Be very afraid

According to an official guess, there could be 2 million people driving on Britain’s roads with eyesight so defective that they could cause a lethal crash at any moment.

Similar Story

The government is refusing to reveal the crime rates for migrants to avoid stoking racial tension? In reality, to avoid letting us know the high proportion of criminal scum among the migrants Labour lets into the UK so casually.

Quality Slump

In the good old days, head teachers were fearsome authority figures, who were in charge. Now, a teaching union is having to urge them to hold parents responsible for kids who behave badly at school.
    Go woke and everything drops to pieces around you. That’s the story with our schools.

A bit of sense

The head of the GMB union thinks Beer Smarmer’s Nett Zero stuff is ‘bonkers’. He’s equally scathing about the claim that it will create 600,000 jobs. “Yeah, in China.”

Just what everyone needs

Edstone Milipede is giving us regional energy prices. It must be so because he’s denying it so frantically!

A job to be done

The asphalt industry reckons it would cost £17 billion to repair all the potholes in the roads in England and Wales.
    Which means that not turning the Chagos Islands over to Mauritius could get something useful done here, and leave a billion pounds over for the Chancellor to waste.
    Something that’s much too sensible even for Serbeer Smarmer even to consider.

Eye off the ball

How did our wonderful PM mark St. George’s Day? With more of his pathetic ramblings about the far-Right.
    Where there is a Labour politician, let there be pointless division.

Not a lot to celebrate

In the good old days, a plaque on the wall used to make where someone famous had spent some time. Now, it’s more than likely to have been put there by the Metropolitan police to mark where someone had their phone stolen. And the police failed to recover it.

Nul Points

Were our wonderful prime minister’s backroom minions on an extended Easter holiday and does that explain why it took them a week to tell Uncle Beer to go along with the Supreme Court’s ruling on what a woman is?
    With a bunch of his ministers in denial, and Uncle Beer doing nothing, we’ve degenerated to Rule by Rabble.

Doing no favours

After doing some thinking, I’ve come up with my description of the newspaper description of the late Pope Francis as ‘The People’s Pope’. ‘Limp’ is my reaction to that People’s.
    He’s been doing the job for over a decade, and it rather trivializes his career in the top job to try to sum it up in one word.
    Still, all those newspapers will end up in recycling bins and someone else will take over the job and Francis will fade into the background. But with a much better account of his life available than one limp word.

How pointless

What is the point of asking a group of scientists, writers, legal trade members & Yuri Geller the question: “What REALLY happens when we DIE?” Absolutely none at all. Their notions have no basis in fact to act as bedrock. Fills up a couple of pages in a newspaper, though.

Excellent Idea

If, as the TV advert claims, replacing a few doors can let people pretend they have a new kitchen, why can’t we do the same with Nett Zero?
    Replace a few doors, pretend the climate has become okay and prevent that nutter Edstone from handing trillions of pounds to China for solar stuff made using slave labour.

Holiday over!

“This is bank security . . .” just after noon yesterday. Some scammer operating from the Leeds area hoping to get my bank card details. Cue the phone going down serenaded with some choice bad language.

One bloke with the right attitude

The Chief Constable of Greater Manchester has done some vigorous mocking of other forces, which lock people up for ‘guff’ like daring to complain about their child’s school on the internet.
    Not that our wonderful government is helping the situation by trying to introduce a ‘cry baby’ culture, which will let any worker who gets a bit upset about anything at all drag the employer into court in search of compensation. Aided by a grasping lawyer, of course.

A solution?

Astronomers using the James Webb space telescope think they’ve spotted life on a planet 120-odd light years away. Which offers an interesting possibility.
    Why not use it as a processing centre for asylum claims if it can support life?
    Of course, the claimants would have to take their small boats with them as the planet is covered with oceans. It’s also eight times bigger than the Earth, which gives them plenty of room to manoeuvre.

Another inevitable

The gang in London wanting special rights for people who don’t know which sex they are couldn’t resist indulging in some mindless vandalism. Just like the Just Stoppers.
    They just don’t get it, do they?

Industrial strength arrogance

Only under a Labour government could you get trade unions announcing that they going to ignore the law of the land, knowing that as they pay for the Labour party, they’ll be allowed to get away with it.

Come to think of it . . .

Have we forgotten the meaning of Easter? Well, yes, quite a few of us have. It wasn’t until I read a piece by Peter Hitchens in the Daily Disaster and saw a drawing of a bloke dragging a huge great wooden cross that I made the connection to the Jews getting their upstart killed by the Romans.
    An early example of betrayal by ‘friends’, which remains commonplace.
    So, Easter eggs, yes. All the religious stuff, no.

Exit with a sigh of relief

You have to feel sorry for poor old Pope Francis, feeling obliged to keep on slogging away at the job despite old age and extreme bad health.
    His decision to keep going makes the choice to retire with dignity made by Pope Benedict look even braver and even more sensible.

Chalk and granite

One of the Labour apologists on GB Views once tried to put the boat-people invaders in the same box as the Jewish migrants who came here in the 1930s to escape the Nazi regime.
    They were Europeans, educated, and well able to take jobs here and do useful work. The boat invaders, in the main, are young men with no talents, who like hanging around schools.
    Not even remotely similar. But when you’re desperate . . .

Climate Swindle

Does burning coal transported half-way round the world in a steel works put less carbon dioxide into the atmosphere than using coal mined in Cumbria? Only if you’re a nutter like Edstone Miliband and your calculation is fraudulent.
    Is he or his supporters blackmailing PM Smarmer? Or does Uncle Beer just not care how much cash Miliband wastes and how ridiculous he makes the UK look?
    Nothing done here has a measureable effect on the global climate. This is a scientific fact. And grounds for dropping Miliband into a deep, dark hole and letting him fester.

Big surprise

The French have given up on attaching an opening up of our coastal waters to EU fishing fleets to giving UK firms access to their EuroWeapons plan.
    The cynics are now watching for another swindle which will stitch us up for daring to Brexit.

Plenty of time on their hands

As well as Hamas supporters doing their parades in London, the citizens now have to put up with outraged supporters of the trans cause clogging the streets with futile protests.
    And Scotland’s capital wasn’t left out. Edinburgh had to put up with more of the same.
    Do they expect the Supreme Court to issue an urgent apology to them for getting the issue of biological sex wrong? Talk about flogging a dead donkey.

Just talk

Putin the poisoner declared a limited cease fire for Easter but Ukraine’s air raid alerts continued unabated.
    Putin then made threatening noises about violations of the cease fire. As he’s the only one doing the violating, does that mean he’s going to have to impose sanctions on himself?

Weird

How can you have any confidence in a “Big Four” accountancy firm which keeps being fined half a million pounds by the regulator for doing a botched job on a major company?

Catty Green

A host of female celebs have expressed the opinion that the Blue Horizon Six, who were sent to the edge of space on the Amazon boss’s launcher, should be shot into space again.
    And not brought back this time.

Close to a full house?

28 of Beer Smarmer’s ministers are members of the Unite union? Well, that certainly explains the government’s total inability to do anything about a strike involving a few dozen non-jobs, which were handed out by Birmingham’s council the last time the union was being unreasonable.

Not an attraction

It now costs four quid for a lukewarm cup of coffee in London! Do we blame it on all the additional overheads shoved on coffee shops by our Chancellor?
    Things must be even worse in New York if you have to pay eight bucks for a cup there!

Do as I say stuff

London’s useless mayor wants more people to ride around on bikes. Is this him channelling Boris?
    No danger of his setting an example by doing it himself instead of motoring around in an armour-plated limo with a huge police escort.
    Typical bloody politician. Telling everyone else what to do but not making a personal contribution himself.

Not living up to the billing

Is it a Good Friday? Look out the window at the grey sky and its rating can be no more than average to poor.
    But at least it’s not chucking it down with rain yet. That’s a treat yet in store for next week.
    But on the positive side, maybe some good storms in the Channel will slow down the flood of migrants which our wonderful government is doing nothing about.

Time Shift

Crumbs! We’ve only just got to Easter but the Six Million Dollar Man was doing Xmas last night! Complete with a Scrooge-type company boss.

It’s him

Nice to see the Chinese dumping the blame for the failure of the Scunthorpe steel works to be other than loss-making. The insane Miliband green taxes make the energy needed by the plant ridiculously over-priced.
    If Beer Smarmer had any sense, he’d sack Edstone before he can do any more damage.
    But sense isn’t something we associate with Uncle Beer, who seems to be fixated on selling us out to the EU and betraying Brexit every way he can.

Majorities can be ignored?

 The grooming gang cover-ups and the Supreme Court ruling on what a woman is have got the Labour party and the trade unions that pay for it even more tangled than usual.
    Go for the minority vote and to hell with normal people, especially if they’re white. That’s the far-Left’s agenda.

No rush

Astronomers using data from the James Webb space telescope think they may have spotted chemicals characteristic of life in the atmoshere of a planet 124 light years away.
    But before you get excited about a planet that seems to be teeming with life, remember they’re going to spend another year or two confirming the observation.
    It’s rather surprising that anyone takes the ‘are we alone’ issue seriously any more, given the sheer size of the universe, and there are actually people eager for proof that life on Earth is not unique.

No sale

One of my correspondents has had a letter from an outfit called AllClear offering 20% off 2025 travel plan insurance this spring.
    One small snag. The letter is addressed to his father, who hasn’t been around for well over a decade now. Just shows you how up to date some companies, or the companies they buy mailing lists from, keep those lists up to date.

Very confusing

We are surrounded by apple trees in full white blossom and on some dull days, with a half a gale blowing, it has been possible to look out of a window and see showers of white flakes which look just like snow.
    And going outdoors on a day like that can feel positively wintry.

Surprise!

The Supreme Court has astounded the nation with a ruling that being a woman is a matter of biology rather than just a whim. Which puts the defenders of female spaces 100% in the right and those who seek to invade them 100% in the wrong.

More waste of money

Meanwhile, north of the border, HM Inspectorate of Prisons for Scotland wants the taxpayer to cough up for wigs and underwear for the benefit of male prisoners who want to pretend to be female.

Worthwhile task!

The Ministry of Justice has outraged the friends of dangerous criminals by setting up an artificial intelligence system to monitor the bad guys and, presumably, jump on them if they look like doing something nasty.
    Very inventive!

That time of year

Our local health centre was handing out coronavirus boosters to oldies yesterday. Something that ain’t going away.
    One of the customers was surprised to be able to report that there was hardly anyone else there in the early afternoon. Are we having a spell of good health?

Out of excuses

Some of the Labour apologists on GB Views are getting really desperate when they try their blame-shifting. One in particular, who used to be an MP, keeps mentioning Margaret Thatcher.
    Desperation doesn’t come more desperate than that.

Useless bunch

The UK government & the Chinese owners are faffing around and keeping the Scunthorpe steel plant on the edge of disaster and closure. Don’t you just wish our wonderful Labour government could get a grip just once?

Another historical rewrite?

Are the purists now going to have to describe the type of oppression abolished by the likes of William Wilberforce as ‘ancient slavery’ to separate it from the modern sort?

Flexibility Rules, US

Donald Trump might have a spine of steel that will not break, but all his shenannygans with tariffs prove that he can bend it into any shape that suits the moment!

Drop dead

“Did somebody say Jar Steet?”
“Nope.”

Not impressed

Okay, the Amazon boss shot six women up on an 11-minute suborbital flight in one of his Blue Horizon capsules and they landed safely in Texas. But it’s hardly a major landmark in the history of space flight. More rather pointless vertical tourism.

Self-inflicted doom!

Something else to panic about! If you don’t take your shoes off at the front door, a gang of experts reckons, you track millions of particles containing stuff like pesticides into your home.
    Combinations of these pesticides cause cancers and all sort of other nasty stuff. As a result, you’re doomed.
    Worse, cats and dogs also bring in particles, which means that their shoes need to be removed at the door and they need to be shampoo’d before admission.

Next Step?

If you’re in gaol for 55 years as an accessory to the Manchester Arena bombing, and you launch a murderous assault on some prison staff after some idiot let you work in the kitchen, it’s difficult to see what more can be done to you.
    Except applying an automatic death sentence for going beyond what society should be forced to bear.

We’re not entirely bankrupt

 Despite all the doom ‘n’ gloom and costa living crisis, there are still people making a hobby out of going to an airport at some ungodly hour of the morning for a cheap flight to enjoy a day trip to somewhere in Europe.

Big snag

One thing the companies recreating extinct animals like the dire wolf can’t do is provide parents to teach the babies how to survive in the wild. Which makes the notion of reinventing the woolly mammoth to stop global warming in the Arctic look a rather daft idea.

Sounds about right

Birmingham’s least favourite pub – the Rat & Picket.
    Internal scrapping within the Unite union and the national bosses getting in the way are now copping for the blame for not doing a deal with Birmingham council.

The Labour way

Our wonderful government has managed to tax London out of the top five richest cities in the world.
    Some 11,300 of the richest (former) residents have up sticks in the last year and moved elsewhere. Taking their cash with them, of course.

Even more of it

As well as filling the streets with coppers, we have Uncle Beer claiming he’s going to rip up red tape and have a bonfire of quangos, only to create a new equal pay quango, which will apply the red tape of demanding that employers provide records of staff wages plus the race of the recipient.

Wrong target

I read in the Sunday Post that the whole of Scotland is officially at extreme risk of wildfires. Moments later, the Mansion cat was scurrying indoors as a token scattering of rain fell here to dampen paths.
    It never lands where it’s needed!

Going in opposite directions

It rather makes a nonsense of our wonderful prime minister’s guarantee to fill the streets with coppers when you have clowns like the chief constable of the West Yorkshire police putting a ban on recruiting people with a white skin for bean-counting reasons.
    He should be locking himself up for blatant racialism. But like that’s going to happen!

Get rid?

A lot of bosses of British companies seem welded to the woke and diversity garbage, which is sloshing around here. It will be interesting to see if the Trump strategy of abolishing it in the United States does Make America Great Again while we poor Brits continue to struggle with merit subjugated to pointless quotas.

Could be

There seems to be a fair bit of support for the people who invade the exclusion zone around an abortion clinic to harass the women going there.
    No doubt the supporters own one of the set of Great Mugs of Our Time. I’m thinking of the one with the slogan “You don’t have to be NASTY to work here, but it helps’.

Poles apart

Conflicting advice from the experts. Those in security think we should have a 3-day supply of food, water, medicines and other essentials on hand for when the Russians blast the North Sea energy pipelines and Britain goes dark.
    Military experts, on the other hand, think this is a daft idea and we should be doing more to defend ourselves against the Russian ships which sneak around in our water, up to no good.
    That’s the thing about experts. There’s always lots of them around and they always think their point of view is the right one. Which is why dealing with the Chinese plague turned out to be such a shambles.

Lost cause?

We missed it here but fans of rats and the RSPCA were celebrating World Rat Day on the first Friday of the month. It was all about not calling people dirty rats and demeaning the good name of the rat population.
    No doubt the celebrations went over big in Birmingham now that it’s Rat City.

If Only

“If you find the following programme offensive, then you are a creep and a blot on the landscape, and you should be thoroughly ashamed of your lack of contact with reality.”

Modern Times

A surfer was dragged from the sea unconscious off Newquay and had his wetsuit cut off for safety reasons before an air ambulance ride to hospital.
    He’s now hoping enough mugs will crowd fund a new wetsuit for him so he can start risking his neck again.
    No danger of the bloke saving up the £350 himself?

There’s always something

Do you want to mock a particular politician? Never much effort involved as they put being noticed ahead of good sense. The French, president, for instance, is being mocked mercilessly for the amount of cologne that he splashes on himself throughout the day. Easy target.

What security?

Our government keeps going on about energy security when it’s pushing its green bollocks agenda. The UK’s largest wind farm was ripped to shreds by a storm last December and it’s still not working again.
    Vast amounts of subsidy cash going to something too fragile to be of any great use. That’s politics for you.

Word of the day

It has to be entitlement. Our wonderful prime monster feels entitled to hoover up freebies at a rate which makes Freebie Reeves look like a rank amateur, the Commons Speaker feels entitled to his own private jet for his globe-trotting and the anti-Israel faction of Labour MPs feel entitled to slag the country off then be made welcome there when they turn up looking for more slagging material.

A spot of good sense

Our wonderful prime minister has been forced to go for growth over green bollocks and allow Luton airport to expand. Next thing you know, he’ll be offering us an apology for making Freebie Reeves the Chancellor and all the economy trashing his government has managed in its first 9 months.

Really, really desperate

The anti-British mob in the United States are obviously very hard up for things to wallop us with.
    Why else would they start yelling about free speech on behalf of the attention-seekers, who deliberately make a nuisance of themself within an abortion clinic’s exclusion zone?

Boring but true

There’s a lot of sense to the objections to female leads playing all-action, kick ’em in the teeth characters in spy films.
    If the bloke is a foot taller than you and weighs twice as much, it makes a lot more sense to avoid a fight and to sneak up behind him and shoot him in the back of the head.
    Aren’t female spies supposed to be smarter than the blokes? But maybe sneaky ain’t good box-office.

Very small bomb

Is it a Royal bombshell if Prince Andrew asked for advice from his brother, King Charles? As it’s an eminentrly sensible thing to do, only in the mind of the excitable journalist.

The right decision

I am now feeling less noble for not watching the must-see TV show about the teenage killer kid and not contributing to the coffers of NeatFlix.
    Thanks to an article by Boris Johnson, I now know for sure that the show is tripe of the sort which impresses only people like our wonderful prime minister, Uncle Beer, who is demanding it be shown in schools at the sacrifice of some proper class work.

A real killer

A Daily Disaster reader pointed out that if something is ‘non-crime’, then it’s nothing to do with the police.
    Which makes any copper who wastes time on a non-crime during duty hours guilty of misconduct in a public office and liable to be disciplined.
    Likewise, a senior copper who tells a minion to do some non-crime stuff is not fit for purpose and needs to be demoted.

Pragmatic

‘Inclusive for all’ it said in small lettering on the side of the British Gas van along with a rainbow flag. Translation: ‘No matter how weird you are, we’ll take money off you!’

What really happened?

Did Israel actually deport a couple of Labour MPs. Or did someone find their names on a list of undesirables at the airport when they arrived and tell them: “You’re not welcome here, sling your hook.”
    Which saved Israel the expense and inconvenience of a formal deportation.

Way off the mark

A computer analysis @ MIT in America, made in 1972, predicted that mankind would face catastrophe in fifty years’ time, with drastic falls in population in the early 21st century.
    This would be due to food shortages and pollution. Well, given the overpopulated state of the world today, they got that a bit wrong! And distribution, not shortage, has been the food problem for ages. And silly wars getting in the way.

A small step

It’s nice to see some senior judges getting embarrassed by the daft decisions made by their juniors over deporting criminals and visa overstayers and similar blots on our landscape.
    But there’s no sign of the juniors being sacked for being unfit for purpose.
    And the government is still doing nothing about the judiciary hijacking human rights law and bending it out of shape.
    What we need is a big stride in the direction of good sense.

No thanks to him

Our wonderful prime minister is trying to take some credit for the UK ending up in the 10% Trump Tariff bin. Except that it’s the dumping ground for 125 countries of not much economic significance to the USA’s bean-counters.
    And if Smarmer had got his way over Brexit, we’d have been in the 20% tariff bin with the E bloody U.
    Good old Beer voted against it 48 times in the Commons and trying to have a ludicrous People’s Referendum afterwards (who voted anyway, if not people?) to get it cancelled.
    Definitely not on Britain’s side.

End of the world?

What do you do when you can’t get on the internet? Say lots of rude words about the non-existent Virgin Media connection and go and do something that doesn’t involve a computer.

Truth as an optional quality

If you want to get away with outright lies on TV adverts, dive into the net zero territory. Building arrays of pylons and off-shore wind farms won’t give us energy security when the wind don’t blow or it blows too fast.
    And it definitely will not give us affordable electricity because of the subsidies showered on wind farms.

Not what we’re paying for

Is there a dafter idea than the police policy of making the arrest and charging statistics for each social group/minority/skin colour match exactly by letting some criminals off and being extra severe with others if their group isn’t doing enough crime?
    Is there any hope for senior coppers who think it’s not racialist to give preferential treatment to criminals who are not white?
    After the blaze of publicity this lunacy has received, there’s still no sign of it being junked. Why?

A good way to have fun

What’s a good way to respond to the Trump tariffs? In India, they turned him into Guy Fawkes and stuck him on bonfires.

There’s a good idea

A Daily Disaster reader came up with an analogue to starter homes for young people – finisher homes for pensioners. A cheap one- or two-bedroom bungalow.
    Sounds much too practical ever to happen.
    And there’s the problem of a house full of stuff; shrinking it to the smaller space. Do you just chuck it away, or do you try to get some return on the money you paid for it.

Just Jealous?

The leader of the SNP is frothing at the mouth over the cheek of a former treasurer of the party, who moved his homes to rent investments to England after the SNP stuck a 6% tax on second homes.
    “Morally wrong”, Mr. Swinney is yelling.
    But not illegal. There are no laws requiring people to not to take their money elsewhere to avoid taxes. And there are no laws requiring people to follow the moral standards of someone else with their investments.
    Assuming the ‘moral outrage’ is genuine and not just a fit of jealousy aimed at someone who’s more successful than Swinney.

Potholes in the system

Our wonderful prime minister thinks he’s going to tackle the pothole plague by doing a rant at local councils, and then offering 5% less junding for the job than they got last year.

Beyond Two Tier Justice

The nation’s police chiefs want to harmonize their statistics for each grouping in the nation so that arrest and charging records match exactly for each group.
    Which means lenience of a minority which is crime-prone and undue savagery shown to a minority which behaves itself.
    No wonder people are concluding that there ain’t no justice in the justice system with bozos like these in charge.

Busy doing nothing

It’s amazing what can happen in the world of politics. Our dear prime minister has done a lot of sucking up to President Trump in search of trade deal, and go nowhere.
    And after the Trump tariff fest, he’s going to sit on his hands and not respond.
    And somehow, we’re expected to believe that he’s pulled off a masterstroke of politics.
    Right.

Not even close

It’s true, the actors chosen to play the four Beatles in a set of biopix don’t look anything like the bloke they’re pretending to be.
    Some plastic surgery, maybe?

Who’s the athlete?

On the subject of good old T.J., he always has to do a hell of a lot of running to chase after bad guys. Did he have a stunt double to do most of it?
    A star should be able to command one.

Virtue at the taxpayer’s expense

I used to know a local councillor who told me that some council members think it makes them look good if the Town Clerk is paid a ridiculous salary
    Which explains why 4,000 Town Hall staff are on over £100K, plus pension and expenses, and hundreds are paid more than Beer Smarmer gets for being in charge of the entire UK.

Fair question

“Do you have a first name, Callaghan?” the Six Million Dollar Man once asked Oscar’s diminutive aide.
    “Yes,” she replied.
    I wonder if you’d get the same response from T.J. Hooker!

Mugs Galore

You have to be really desperate for attention to splosh loads of money on a handbag that looks like a cornflakes packet or a slice of pizza. Luckily for the people who turn this stuff out, there are lots of attention-seekers with lots of spare dosh around.

Trivial in comparison

We’re supposed to have problems with obesity, but the Indians have us totally beat!
    The government of India reckons it will have 440 million obese people in 2050 because the city dwellers are scoffing junk food. And 800 million people living in poverty on meagre state hand-outs.

Distorted values

How curious that our wonderful Chancellor thinks it’s a good idea to take cash away from carers, who do essential work, but not from those who choose not to have anything to do with work.
    But expecting good sense from politicians is expecting something that rarely happens.

Running out of options

s there anything Trump hasn’t stuck a tariff on? Or is he going to have to resort to sticking tariffs on his existing tariffs to keep on promoting his tough guy image?

Legal conundrum

Is a caution still valid if the cop says “Do you understand these rights as I have read them to you?” if she has actually recited them from memory rather than read a script?

The Chagos Kid

President Trump is said to have given our wonderful prime minister the go-ahead to betray British taxpayers by handing over the Chagos Islands to Mauritius – and also £18 billion that we can’t afford due to Labour’s trashing the economy.
    There’s a theory that Labour hates Britain and that’s why Beer Smarmer and his gang do stuff like this. A very convincing theory. And Uncle Beer doesn’t seem bothered by going down in history as the Chagos Betrayer.

Finally, some sense

Despite the best efforts of the embedded wokes, the Office for National Statistics has finally binned the number of trans people acquired from the 2021 census.
    It has been known for ages that the number is a gross exaggeration as people who didn’t have English as their first language gave meaningless replies. But what do the wokes care about actual facts when they are pushing one of their agendas?

Originality binned

D. Trump has been accused of applying the rules of the George Orwell novel 1984 to the governance of the United States. He has made truth and lies interchangeable according to the convenience of Big Donald. Are the US and Russia going to end up as interchangeable bad guys?

Lost Cause

Is there a museum which still does accurate history? Probably not in London. The London Museum has now gone hopelessly woke and it’s busy putting an anti-whiteness agenda into place as part of the Hate Everything British campaign.

More hot air

Birmingham Council doing the Major Incident act over the streets full of refuse has the aroma of pointless posturing.
    Getting some private contractors; and rath-catchers; in to clear the place up on public health grounds would actually make more sense.

No Sale

That Maltesers ad with ‘the companion’ is pretty diverse and pathetic. Fire the agency, get someone decent. If there is still anywhere that can do a decent TV ad without being woke.

That’s a good one!

Question: Ukraine needs a peace-keeping force; what is the UN doing these days?
Answer: The same as Keep Britain Tidy is doing for the litter-strewn UK.

Oh, well

President Trump has made noises about taking America into the Commonwealth of Nations, hoping that King Charles will dish out an invite. Sadly for Trump, it has been pointed out, any invitation will have to come after a vote of the members; it’s not a Royal Gift; and several of those members are sunk deep into China’s Belt & Braces pocket and not likely to welcome him.

Looking ahead

The Commons Speaker reckons that wokists in his former party are intent on ousting him. Not because of his appetite for junkets at the taxpayer’s expense, but in order to get some really woke wonk into the job before Labour loses the next general election.

On Target

Patrick Chrispys of GB Views got it spot on. All the going on about Ramadan by the usual suspects makes a mockery of all the Islamophobia accusations.
    As far as real people are concerned, it’s just something they’re not bothered about rather than afraid of.

The death of education

The wheels really have come off if a toddler can be chucked out of a nursery school because some idiot thinks the kid has a transphobic attitude. Really? A three- or four-year-old?

Not helping

If the Governor of the Bank of England really thinks the state pension should be means tested, he is clearly unfit to hold a public office and he should be sacked forthwith.
    And no pension for the blighter.

It’s not a struggle!

I’m working hard to avoid seeing the Neatflix series about a killer kid. Unfortunately, lots of others seem to be doing their best to erode my uniqueness by not watching it either. Incel or gencel – genetically celibate through being too repulsive for any self-respecting female to want anything to do with them?

Safe bet?

The speculators reckon that there’s a 50:50 chance that Freebie Reeves, our wonderful Chancellor, will be back with more tax rises in the autumn.
    But what are their odds that she’ll still be in the job then?

Stranger than fiction

What has the government really been doing with the Winter Fuel Allowances grabbed off pensioners? Three of the allowances were awarded to a Labour MP, who put her pet dog on her Parliamentary expenses.
    As Little John of the Daily Disaster tells us, you couldn’t make it up.

Strange Reticence

Hundreds of thousands of people are being forced into poverty by the government’s tax grabs and welfare cuts, we are being told. But no one ever quotes the numbers that constitute poverty, either as a weekly or annual income.
    I wonder what the reason for that is. Could it be that a lot of the ‘poverty’ is relative, and for every person in dire straits, there are thousands unable to afford holidays abroad and the like?

Just fantasy

Freebie Reeves is claiming that the world is in a state of flux; or all fluxed up; and that’s why the wheels have come off her financial plans.
    And yet she’s promising families will be £500 better off by the end of the current Parliament. Which has to be almost twice as big a lie as Edstone Miliband’s £300 quid off energy bills.

Yecch!

Is there a more stoopid TV advert than the one with the upside down mouth in the middle of a forehead? Whatever it’s for, I’m not buying!

Zedmed lives!

But only in the trailers for current T.J. Hooker episodes. The Legend channel has not been bothered about updating.

Not us, Gov.

Should we all hang our heads in shame at having a government which is okay with the use of slave labour in the manufacture of Chinese solar stuff? Or can the 80% of the electorate who didn’t vote Labour just chant, “Told you so!” at regular intervals?

Today’s Other Question

This war in Ukraine that President Trump was going to stop a month ago. What’s the word on that?

Just not true

The Miliband claim that solar panels installed here will cut our carbon dioxide emissions sufficiently to balance the ones from China when the panels were made is a black lie. Nothing we do here makes even a small dent in China’s emissions.

Not a mate

It doesn’t look like Ukraine is going to get much of a deal from Trump. He’s working hard to give Putin everything he wants. Meanwhile, Trump is after Ukraine’s minerals, power plants, oil & gas, and everything else he can get his germans on.

Today’s Question

Shampoo that helps with dandruff, read the title to the article. Helps it to do what? Flourish?

Let down

There was a disappointing lack of panther cartoon graphics to go with the closing credits of Revenge of the Pink Panther (1978). Did they run out of cash suddenly?

Not the full monty

Amazon Spring Deals become so much less impressive when you realize that spring goes on for 3 months but the deals last for just a week.

Seems fair

I have been advised that letters about what will happen to the old state  pension next month can include the information: ‘Age addition of 25p per week will be payable from your 80th Birthday’.
    This ‘bonus’ was introduced in 1971 and represented 4% of the pension rate then, which means it should be £7 now.
    The fact that it is still being paid at the same antique rate to certain Oldies is now seen as nothing more than the government sticking up two fingers at them.
    Maybe our MPs, who have just received a generous pay rise, should be required to spend some time on the 1971 salary and expenses regime to find out how funny the joke is.

Gone Guy

I note that the curiously named Adrian Zmed (Zedmed to us Brits) seems to have been binned from series 5 of T.J. Hooker, leaving pool old T.J sidekickless.
    And in episode 2, T.J.’s ex-cop dad turned up to be shot dead right at the end!

Latin explained

I knew that sic transit gloria mundi means get the sick note to me by Monday. I was delighted to learn that honi soit qui mal y pense means I honestly think I’m going to be sick.

What do we make of this?

There’s this advert about people getting in trouble over paying for their home. Featuring a woman of colour in what’s predominantly a white nation.
    Is this woke DEI garbage? Or is the message that incomers are more likely to get into financial trouble? Either way, it’s a signal that maybe this firm is one to be avoided.

Overhaul seriously overdue

There doesn’t seem to be any danger of the government fixing the broke judicial system.
    Whilst we have judges who are prepared to have killers dragged to their court to hear the sentence after a guilty verdict, there are others who abuse human rights laws shamelessly by making up their own version of what came out of Parliament.
    And then there are the ones who don’t know basic facts of life like difference between Iraq and Iran.

More fantasies

Our government is claiming it will save £5 billion by fixing the broken welfare system. One in-depth scrutiny of the plan has concluded that £160 million at the most is on offer, and another came to the conclusion that scroungers gaming the system would prevent any savings at all!

The Chancellor’s Spring Statement

"It’s not my fault the economy has been trashed. Everyone else is to blame.
    "And stop bloody going on about my freebie addiction. It’s not as if I’m the only one doing it."

Really?

Save time, money and the environment, the advert read. How much saving is a battery powered lawnmower instead of one using petrol going to do?
    Whatever happened to honesty in advertising?
    Or has it been put on hold for the duration of the bogus climate emergency?
    I suspect the latter if we’re still getting those TV ads for smart meters featuring an Albert Einstein cartoon. His image is supposed to be really tightly controlled. That’s just not credible.

Something to avoid

Apparently, the glass screens used to build showers can explode spontaneously! In the middle of the night, which is bad enough, and also whilst someone is using the shower, which is infinitely worse.
    But it’s not something a place with plastic shower curtains has to worry about.

Not exactly value for money

The Leader of the House of Commons, I read, used to be a political old-timer with some standing, and the examples confirmed this; all people I’d heard of.
    The present incumbent is just one of Ed Milipede’s groupies, which just illustrates the net zero level of talent on offer by the current Labour lot.

Watch out!

After grabbing Ukraine’s rare minerals, President Trump’s next target is the nation’s power stations.
    Maybe the bloke in charge of Heathrow airport should start to become worried about his collection of them!

They don’t get it

I’ve just read that a GenZ (whatever that is) ‘worker’ wanted a day off, instead of taking annual leave, to get a tattoo. She claimed it was a medical appointment and vital to her mental ’elf!
    Do skivers learn which button to push at school now?
p.s. If there’s a mess and you can’t be bothered to clear it up, just announce that it would be ‘too triggering’ and walk away.

Mug Mob

What sort of people are Labour activists? Fools and scroungers if they think that fool Milipede is doing the best job in the Cabinet, and Smarmer and Reeves have the lowest approval ratings.
    Mainly because they’ve been confronted with the realities of real life and they’re floundering, which the likes of Milipede and Labour activists aren’t in their non-reality bubble.
    Spend the most of other people’s money on stuff of no value and become a Labour hero. Sheesh!

Fantasy factory

Our wonderful Chancellor says she wants to move more money to the front line of public services by getting rid of dead wood.
    Redundancy pay for the corpses eats up all the cash ‘saved’.
    Nothing much ends up on the front line.

Buck-passing

The first lesson we can learn from the Heathrow shutdown is that the buck will be in constant motion. The head of the National Grid reckons that any of the three substations which are connected to the airport can keep the place running.
    The boss of the airport reckons that all the computers had to be safely shut down and safely rebooted, and that’s why the place went dark.
    It was a totally unexpected emergency and there was no plan for dealing with it. And, as with the Chinese plague, all the experts are claiming that they are right.

Just a thought

When it comes to getting rid of the dead wood in the civil service, maybe they should start with the people who let official credit cards to be used to blow £675 million on things like nights out during junkets abroad, DJ equipment, shoes costing more than 2 grand per pair and coffee pods in bulk instead of low-value goods and services.

All about the dosh

It’s interesting that the ‘experts’ who were seen as the Chinese plague gurus are still claiming that the modified coronavirus didn’t escape from the laboratory in Wuhan. Not wanting to upset the Chinese and lose out on research grants?

So much for inclusion

This obsession with creating groups of young people; millennials, GenX, GenZ, etc.; is making rather a mockery of the claims by social manipulators that they are building a cohesive society.

Keep on trying!

The private space firm Intuitive Machines doesn’t seem to be having much success with the legs of its lunar landers. Last year’s vehicle, IM-1 called Odysseus, managed to break one of the legs and tipped over at a 30 degree angle.
    Despite this setback, all the instruments continued to work for the planned week of the mission. And then the Sun set and the vehicle wasn’t built to survive a 2-week lunar night.
    This month’s effort with IM-2 called Athena, managed to tip over onto its side leaving 2 legs up in the air and had to be declared done with right away.
    Maybe next time?

More ‘all talk’

The government says, ‘lessons will be learned’ from an investigation of the power failure which shut down Heathrow airport.
    A nation laughs scornfully, knowing they never are.

Worser and Worser

News media revealing the scams of those benefiting from Motability is just bringing more and more to light. Things like cars being used as minicabs and people rent them to neighbours.
    Is the government going to do anything about this gross abuse of taxpayers’ money?
    Or is the Labour party just not bovvered?

Social comment?

Crossword clue: bodily part commonly pierced (7)
Is that a comment on the people who have the job done to their earlobes? That they are common?

Idle hands

Do the works of William Shakespeare need to be decolonized? They were written long before the British went forth into the world to civilize it. And make a few bob out of the process.
    What would be a much better idea would be to dewonkize The Shakespeare Birthplace Trust.

Don’t come back

Nice to see that crazy American who had to make a video of her wombat-harassing activities did the Australians a favour: she deported herself, saving them the bother.

Bottle Job

That’s the verdict on Labour’s ‘reforms’ of the broken welfare system. Despite all the posturing from our prime minister, his Work & Pension Secretary assured her party that she is not interested in being tough.
    Which explains why her cuts have been described as a flea-bite. 8% now dropping to 5% at the end of the decade as the bloat continues.
    No pain for cheating skivers. It’s the Labour way.

Endemic Defect?

Two-Kier Justice is still due to begin next month, which raises the question of why our prime minister hasn’t sacked his Justice Secretary in favour of someone who will take on the wonks of the Sentencing Council.
    Could it be that there is no one in the Labour party who gets the concept of equal justice for all?

Different drain

Abolishing the QANGO Public Health England will cost the nation £800 million in redundancy payments.
    Which means that there won’t be a boost of cash going to front line NHS staff.
    Benefit to us taxpayers is always a lost cause when the government is involved.

More Two-Tier justice

The Home Office has been shamed into cancelling the fine imposed on the couple who had a Sudanese stowaway in the bike rack of their camper van.
    But the penalty has not been cancelled, which is gittish.
    And there are no penalties being slapped on the Customs bods who checked the van over and failed to spot the stowaway.

One Domino

I suppose it’s a start that the Tory leader has realized that the net zero by 2050 is unachievable and just a fantasy. Shame she’s not pointing out every time she’s on the subject that nothing done here has any measurable effect on the global climate and there’s no need to do anything.
    But there are all those global warming swindlers with their hands out, demanding our dosh. And a Labour government letting them get away with it.

Parp-Parp

Little John of the Daily Disaster strikes again revealing that we as a nation are handing out 50-grand sports cars to chancers with mobility issues.
    Motability is the name of the outfit which is handing out the cars, which are used for such essential purposes as mini-cabs and getaway cars.

Opacity, not transparency

It’s a legitimate question. Why does the Speaker of the House of Commons, whose job is to process about and decide who gets to make a speech in the chamber, need an advisor on overseas territories?
    Even if the advisor is a nice old bloke from Gibraltar who gave Hoyle lots of freebies when he was junketing there.
    Not a question to which an answer is likely to be forthcoming anytime soon.

More two-tier justice

A couple were fined £1,500 for not noticing that a migrant had hidden himself in a bike rack on the exterior of the camper van. No fines for the customs officers and other officials who failed to spot the invader.
    No fines for the Border Force for the thousands of migrants they import after the French had escorted them half way across the Channel.
    The word ‘justice’ in is need of cancellation as there doesn’t seem to be much available any more.

Worth a try

Good luck to Lord Norton of Louth for his attempt to prevent prime ministers like Beer from awarding peerages to cronies and stooges. Persons of merit only, his Lordship would prefer.
    Same with the rest of us.

Future uncertain

The noises coming out of the White House suggest that President Trump’s idea of a peace plan for Ukraine is to divide the country’s assets up between America and Russia.
    Not exactly encouraging for anyone else hoping to make a deal with him.

Get on with it!

The story of the return to Earth of the stranded NASA astronauts in a SpaceX Dragon capsule has to be the immense amount of time spent faffing about instead of parking the recovery ship next to the capsule and hauling it aboard.

Goes with the territory

Should we be outraged that Speaker Hoyle isn’t a good guy after we had to put up with a decade of Berko the Peerageless? Or should we just shrug our shoulders and write him off as another Labour grabber?

The Loud Me Culture

Someone was complaining that cutting benefits would put him in a care home and he’d end up costing the taxpayer more than he gets now. Which ignores the hundreds or thousands on the other side of the equation.
    If they get less, the nation can afford to give the odd person in the complainant’s position special treatment. Even if they can’t see the big picture.

Interesting Viewpoint

According to one commentator, the Farage Party, Reform UK, has a lot in common with Labour as a political party in that its membership doesn't include enough people who know how to do the business of government to be able to form a government which can offer good sense, efficiency & value for money.
    Mr. Smarmer’s mob seem to be very good at talking about all the things they’re going to do but they keep expecting the public to hold their breath for a couple of years, and keep on paying more and more tax, before they’re likely to see any changes.
    Probably for the worse, the cynics add.

Acid Test

Offered by Little John of the Daily Disaster: if Beer Smarmer and his Health Minister, Smug Streeting, are serious about getting rid of useless QANGO bodies, they will close down the UK Health Security Agency as well as PH England.
    If they don’t, that will be a sign that they are all talk and not actually going to slim down the burrocrats, with the result that the crew of PHE will end up in other QANGOs.

Wrong word!

Was it unexpected that our economy shrank in January? Of course, it wasn’t. With this sorry Labour lot in charge, growth would have been unexpected.

Musk Manages

I see the Musk Dragon capsule got to the International Space Station okay, and the launcher was steered back to the rig that captures it for recycling.
    The big question now for the two American astronauts who went for an 8-day jaunt and found themselves doing a 9-month marathon is the weather. Will it be okay for them to head back home tomorrow? [Written on Tuesday]
    Still, if you’ve been stuck in space for all that time, an extra day won’t be too much of a burden.

Mine’s bigger than yours

President Trump shows how tough he is by sticking tariffs on the European Union. The EU shows how tough it is by sticking a 50% tariff on bourbon whisky. Trump then makes a mockery of the game by threatening to stick a 200% tariff on EU wines, especially Champagne.

How to avoid making decisions

First, hold lots of consultations. And then hold lots of consultations about doing consultations. That’s how our wonderful government is putting off doing anything much.
    Which might not be such a bad thing in view of the way our wonderful Chancellor is doing things and wrecking the economy.

Hypocrisy on steroids

How do you save the planet from climate change? Hold the UN’s 30th Conference of the Parties at the back of beyond in Brazil and hack a 4-lane superhighway for the 50,000 useless lumps who will be going to COP30 through what was protected Amazon forest.
    The people who lived along the route are now displaced and minus their living, and not at all happy about the posturing.

A man with a plan

That bloke Musk is going to be a busy bee. As well as driving waste out of the government machine in the United States, he hopes to put one of his robots on Mars at the end of next year and he has ambitions to send humans there in 2029!

Yeah, Right

What official bodies desperately need is an alternative to the ‘Our thoughts are with’ tired old cliché. The spokesperson who uses it may well be genuine enough but to most people, their cliché and insincerity alarms go off simultaneously and loudly.

Why Not?

If a nasty, cold winter encourages an early onset of the hay fever season, and a particularly bad one is forecast for this year, why not encourage global warming and see if that fixes the problem?
    Worth a try. Especially with the electricity shortages that this insane government is hell-bent on creating with its crazy net zero policies.

Biscuit Barrel Stuff

Trigger warnings about ‘depictions of murder’ on a touring production of Agatha Christie’s Murder On The Orient Express? They’re either having a laugh or the people running the show are beyond redemption.

Wrong, Beer

Out posturing prime minister’s QANGO cull should have started with the Sentencing Council, which makes a mockery of the judicial pledge to right to all manner of people. In other words, no special treatment if you’re not white, British and, worst of all in the eyes of the woke, male.

Nowhere near inflation

As reported on last Christmas Eve, a 100 gm bar of Cadbury’s Bourneville dark chocolate shot up in price from £1.35 to £1.50. There’s been another rip-off this month; up to £1.69. 11% for the first rip, now up 25% based on the older price.

Truth bomb

Our wonderful prime minister is declaring war on quangos, is he? Will he start by abolishing the 27 that he has created since taking over the job?

Not that much

The six billion quid that the Work & Pensions Sec. is hoping to save amounts to just less than 2% of the Welfare bill and is probably well within the margin of error for calculating it.
    That bill is also expected to be another £66 billion higher at the end of the decade. Cosmetic, or what.

They’re Okay

Does it really matter that America’s four top tech blokes have ‘lost’ a combined couple of hundred billion dollars through share price crashes? It’s not as if they’ll be wondering where their next meal is coming from, and what goes down goes back up again in due course.
    But it looks like the tech quartet will have to wait for their president to stop having fun and games with tariffs before there’s any hope of recovery.

Spot On

That’s the observation that the punishment should fit the crime, not the criminal, as the woke wonks of the Sentencing Council are trying to inflict on us.

Turn about

“How many poor people are you planning to kill with your welfare cuts, Prime Minister?” That’s what Labour would be asking in Opposition. So it’s only fair to ask them the same question when they’re confronted with the realities of being the government.

Desperation Move?

It has been suggested that if America won’t let Ukraine join NATO, then maybe they could become a member of the British Commonwealth to give them some allies.
    There are precedents for admitting countries which had nothing to do with the British Empire. Not that the rest of the Commonwealth would be that keen about putting boots on the ground to protect Ukraine. Especially the spivs with their hands out for bogus slavery reparations.

Even more evil intent

This week’s assault on the farming industry is cutting off its subsidies. I don’t remember seeing anything about that in the Labour election manifesto. But then again, one hell of a lot was left out of that piece of fiction.

Another setback

The illegal ban on recruiting white males into the RAF has left the service short of Top Gun pilots and made a mockery of our wonderful PM’s promise to put jets in the sky over Ukraine.
    One does get the impression that there is vastly more illegal stuff going on in the public sector than in the whole rest of the civilian population put together.

What was that about?

Will we ever get an explanation for why a cargo ship rammed into the side of a tanker, which was at anchor off the Yorkshire coast? It sounds like a deliberate assault on our coastline by one of our eastern enemies if the tanker is polluting everywhere with jet fuel.
    Unless everyone on the tanker had been celebrating someone’s birthday and the entire crew was in a drunken stupor. But then again, what are the chances of the collision via random chance rather than a deliberate assault?

Political ‘reality’

A KC has told the PM that his attempts to make copyright theft okay in the UK conflict with international law in the form of the Berne Convention, which established that copyright exists as soon as something is written down or otherwise recorded.
    Mr. Smarmer is trying to pretend that as the Convention doesn’t mention A.I. specificially, it’s okay for him to ignore it. Even though the Convention was formulated in 1886, when A.I. didn’t exist.
    So much for the lawyer’s grasp on reality.

Secret reality

It took a 2-year campaign by members of the Press to expose a secret College of Policing protocol that required police officers to report contacts with journalists as well as known criminals, suspects and extremists.
    That protocol has now been cancelled and the CoP is no longer allowed to pretend that journalists are a danger to the police and enemies of society.
    And trust in the people in charge of things like the police has been damaged further.

TV versus reality

In every episode of T.J. Hooker, there are vehicles of one sort or another going up in flames. More than enough to keep TV news channels hopping with glee if it ever happened here. But we’re Once in a Blue Moonland compared to American TV.

Fantasy Politics

Some of Reform UK’s members want a shadow cabinet or a spokesperson for every key issue. President Farage has told them it’s impossible to have a full shadow cabinet with only five members (or 4 after Rupert Lowe got the chop).
    But what about the mouthpieces alternative? Nothing much on offer about that.

Complete the thought

Spotted in a newspaper being recycled: Donald Trump ordering Palestinian refugees to go to Jordan. Maybe he should have gone a bit further and ordered Israel to unoccupy the bits of Jordan that it has grabbed to give the refugees somewhere to go to.

How to be unhelpful to the max

A Daily Mail reader reported that when he phoned a nearby college to ask about its course on basic computer skills for oldies, he was told he’d have to apply online.
    Would that be after using a time machine to ask his future self how to do it?

Mute button at the ready

FIFA is keen to stick an NFL/CFL style half-time show into the next World Cup final for the sake of selling it to Americans TV viewers as the event will be spread from Mexico to Canada.
    Not a popular idea with the players, who are already moaning about all the delays of video refs in a sport which is supposed to be free-flowing, not episodic like the rugby variant played across the Atlantic.

Evolution in action

In the fantastic future, you won’t have to wait to middle age before you can have your Big Life Crisis. The unsettling effect of being exposed to social media is dragging the crisis to younger and younger ages. And this won’t be helped by the government’s assaults on the Safer Phones Bill, which are making it a joke.

With Gritted Teeth?

How much of a strain was it for the Six Million Dollar Man to keep a smile going whilst having to listen to Sonny Bono crooning appallingly during one of his episodes?

An ally we don’t need

The PM of the south of Ireland thinks a good way to be mates with out wonderful PM is to offer to help him to unpick Brexit by stealth. Smarmer’s bound to jump at that. Groan!
    Beer is also reported to be ready and willing to let Chinese spies and the mob who persecute those who escaped from Hong Kong have a free hand here in pursuit of a trade deal with China. And there will be more tax rises in next month’s Spring Statement. Groan again!

Cause & Effect

According to some bunch of experts, 75% of the UK population will be obese by 2050. Which should give the government of the day a large incentive to chuck out illegal and unwanted migrants to leave a bit of room for every else!

More export fodder

Starting with the exhibitionist who was clambering about on Big Ben’s home in London waving a Palestinian flag. And continuing with the yobs who painted their slogan on the Trump golf course in Scotland. Not because we approve of Trump but because we don’t need so many yobs.

Just lame

One of our wonderful courts has ruled that we can send a criminal back to where he came from; Jamaica; as having a criminal record would prevent him from getting a job.
    Shame we can’t make the judge give the criminal board and lodging instead of expecting the taxpayer to fork out.

Great life

The Speaker of the House of Commons is getting a lot of unwelcome publicity after some rotten person did some checking up and found he’d blown a quarter of a million pounds of our money on jaunts around the world. Doing what? Apparently, his over-pompous and peerageless predecessor, the unloved Bercow, took a decade to run up a bill of similar size.

Not all bad!

Reform UK might have the hump with suspended MP Rupert Lowe but he is on our side if he thinks illegals should be dumped on a remote Scottish island and left to feed the midges.

Propaganda everywhere

The rubbish that comes out of universities takes all the biscuits in the tin, these days. There are professors who want global warming swindle propaganda in every lesson in schools.
    Also decolonization by pretending no one from Britain ever achieved anything, it was all done by foreigners and particularly non-white ones.
    Judy Vance is a tool and a half but he was 100% right about the enemies we have to worry about being the ones within.

Philosophy Corner

1. A winner is just a loser who tried one more time.
2. A loser is often a winner who tried one time too many.
    Take your pick.

Really Misleading

‘Keeping bathtime flowing’ read the slogan on the van. Someone called a plumber? No, on the driver’s door was ‘British Gas’ and the slogan ‘here to solve’.
    And to think, someone was actually paid to come up with that.

Never-ending cycle

If everyone in the UK gave up eating dairy and meat, it would have no measurable effect on the global climate, and we’d just have the control freaks yelling at us to give up something else to Save The Planet a bit more.

Terrific Explanation

Footballers constantly spitting on the pitch ensure that it’s well lubricated for those who want to do a slide after scoring a goal.
    Okay, that works!

Absolute non-event

How serious is the ongoing spat between Reform UK MPs? It’s a storm in an eggcup which the news meeja are trying to pretend is a tropical storm as big as the one currently battering bits of Australia. It will all be spent history by the next general election.

Ignorance or intent?

Apparently, President Zelenskiy announced ages ago that he won’t be wearing a suit until the war with Russia is over. If the bozos in charge of the USA don’t know that, and their minions don’t know it either, they’re a bunch of useless lumps. And if they do know and they’re ignoring it, they’re a bunch of nasty bastards.

Get Real

“If you find the following programme offensive and/or discriminatory, you need to grow up, get a life and stop being a far-Left woke wimp.”
    That’s what they should be saying before episodes of long-lasting 20th century TV shows.

Pass

There was a lengthy and pious plug for heat pumps on what was supposed to be the BBC lunchtime news yesterday. Why get one at vast expense and be very afraid to leave a door open?
    To reduce your carbon footprint.
    And what will this actually achieve?
    Bugger all as far as the global (or your local) climate is concerned. And we weren’t told, of course, that the heat pump has a big control pot in a cupboard. Something that looks like it has 1,001 ways to go wrong and need costly repairs on top of an annual servicing.
    If electricity is ever made affordable to ‘working people’, e.g. by binning Edstone and his Nett Zero, some electric radiators and timers looks a much more reliable way of heating a home than a clunking heat pump.

Easy Target

This week’s nickname for Rachel Thieves is ‘The Chancer of the Exchequer’. No doubt there will be something equally cute along next week.

Temporary Relief?

Yesterday was the first day of the year when it actually felt warm outside! Not that the Mansion cat was impressed.
    She went out for a while but she was soon back indoors again, doing her Sphinx impression on her favourite stretch of window sill.
    She got some courage in the afternoon, however, and disappeared for a couple of hours. And after stocking up with some grub, she was off again. Stuck indoors in the evening when the rain arrived.

Helpful suggestion

Stephen Glover of the Daily Mail suggested that next time President Zelenskiy has to interact with Trump, he does it with interpreters there in the name of preventing misunderstanding.
    This would also serve to slow down Trump if he slips back into bully mode.

A set up

Was the Trump/Vance violent assault on President Zelenskiy spontaneous? Not if there was a stooge journalist hovering with the job of asking why Zelenskiy wasn’t wearing a suit as the trigger for the whole disgraceful display.
    Politicians – don’t trust them. Ever.

Looks can deceive

Is the weather wonderful? It certainly looked bright and cheery with the Sun shining down from a lightly clouded sky yesterday. But the Mansion cat wasn’t convinced. She preferred to look out at the sunlit scene from her favourite indoor window sill.

No Disaster

After the alarmists had their moment of panic, NASA and the European Space Agency have reduced the odds of the asteroid 2024 YR4 hitting the Earth down from 3% to 0.001-2%. We can all relax. But have a moment of regret that some kindly deity didn’t arrange for the asteroid to smash onto Putin’s Black Sea palace!

An Explanation

Was Trump having a Biden moment when he accused Ukraine of starting the war with Russia? Trump seems to be having quite a lot of them now that he’s back in the White House.
    Either that, or he just can’t be bothered to pay attention.
    Or maybe a bit of both.

He has form for it

If some tinpot international court rules that Ukraine is rightfully part of Greater Russia, will our wonderful prime minister do a Chagos-style sell-out on President Zelenskiy?

Pull the other one

‘Is this new proof that Jim Morrison DID fake his own death?’ read the headline. To which the answer is nah!
    Could the sometime front man of The Doors be alive and working as a maintenance man in Syracuse at the grand old age of 83? Yeah, sure.

Just a suggestion

What the world needs is a lot more charientism anywhere politics rears its ugly head. That’s insults disguised as jests.

Incomplete Obliteration

Little John of the Daily Disaster came up with an interesting point. Lord Nelson’s portrait has been stuck in a cupboard at the Palace of Westminster and pictures of the likes of Home Sec. Pixie Balls-Cooper are replacing our famous ancestors.
    In the real world, pubs are still being called The Nelson with a picture of the admiral on the sign. Little John can’t imagine a pub being named after Pixie. Me neither.

Not sold on it

Okay, the series is called Bergerac and it’s set on Jersey, but what does it have to do with the series we remember, and which is being repeated around it?
    They might as well have called it Kojak. There’s about the same amount of connection with the original.

Just what we need

The leader of the Conservative party and the leader of Labour in a competition to be the more boring and the better at spouting lots and lots of words without actually saying anything.
    Plenty of exercise for the finger that lands on the TV remote control’s mute button when we see either of them spouting.

Ingenuity pump to maximum

Reporter: “Mr. President, do you still think President Zelenskiy is taking us into World War Three?”
Trump (with a big sarky smile): “Did I say that?”

Repeat, Pause, Repeat

“This is a once in a generational [insert cliché],” quoth the prime minister.
    “If only it were,” sighs his audience.

Long slog

It took the UK 61 years to pay off our bill to the United States after 6 years of World War II. Is that 30 and a half years of payments in store for Ukraine to do the same for their war with Russia if it’s ever called off?
    Let us hope the minerals last out if Trump stops being a wise guy and gets on with making a decent deal.

Groan!

The Chinese plague laboratory in Wuhan has discovered another coronavirus strain in bats. If it can jump species to humans, it will kill 33% of those infected. Let us hope the Chinese now have some biosecurity measures in place in Wuhan or we’re in for another terrible time.

Regal Collateral Damage

King Charles seems to be stuck in the middle of a campaign to cancel the state visit offered to President Trump before Trump and Vance did their mad-dog attack on President Zelenskiy.
    But delaying it with a boot into the long grass seems more likely than calling it off completely. Maybe until the golfing weather is bad.
    Something that won’t improve Trump’s mood any is the way President Zelenskiy was received enthusiastically here by the European leaders, and he also got to spend an hour with King Charles at Sandringham without needing a letter of invitation delivered by Beer Smarmer.

Editing our literary heritage

Kids are abandoning reading books in favour of listening to audiobooks? Well, that’s it for spelling. And eventually, everything not audioed will become inaccessible.

Another con job

Our wonderful prime minister is claiming that he’s going to increase spending on the Defence of the UK. But he’s not denying that the cash he plans to hand to Mauritius during the Chagos Islands betrayal will come out of the Defence budget rather than going on anything of benefit to the UK.
    More smoke and mirrors.

Just so you know

Correspondents are requested not to refer to the Chancellor as Rachel from Accounts as it’s an insult to every competent person working in an accounts department.

Fair’s Square

If, in the future, Europe will have to stop freeloading on America for its Defence against Russia, then it’s only right that the rest of the world should have to stop freeloading on the UK via foreign aid.
    How absolutely amazing that our wonderful prime minister has actually realized this.

Brilliant idea

Instead of the government & local authorities doing their job and creating effective flood defences, the plan now is to release beavers at strategic points to build green dams to deal with a local flooding problem.
    And if there is any flooding, it’s the fault of the beavers, not the politicians!

A spot of confusion

Beer Smarmer’s plan to boost defence spending to 2.5% of GDP by 2027 has been dismissed in the newspapers as a ‘pathetic sap’ to appease President Trump.
    But don’t they mean a pathetic ‘sop’ delivered by a pathetic sap? The vowel makes all the difference.

Well, that was unexpected

Is President Trump getting so desperate for something totally outrageous to do that he had to resort to picking a fight with President Zelenskiy of Ukraine during a televised do at the White House?
    Definitely a master class in The Art of Avoiding a Deal!

Shot in the foot

In these hard times, the charity Macmillan Cancer Support has had to sack a quarter of its staff and cancel a hardship scheme. But, as noted previously, it can still find £100K to offer as the salary for a head of diversity crap.
    The charity is now even worse off as subscribers are giving up in disgust and diverting their generosity elsewhere after finding that their donations will be wasted.

Zero social responsibility

Is there something about becoming a Labour local councillor that switches part of the brain off?
    That’s the obvious conclusion to be drawn from the police telling councillors to call off a meeting about one of their mad, anti-social schemes because the local police farce couldn’t guarantee their safety from outraged CTax-payers objecting to a totally mad scam drawn up by mentally challenged councillors.

Smart move

Our wonderful prime minister’s decision to sacrifice overseas aid in the cause of building up our defences was a real surprise from the bloke who seems intent on selling out our country at every opportunity.
    It has upset lots of the right people but it does make sense. We as a nation have put a lot of money and effort into civilizing the rest of the world but what do we get in return?
    No, not appreciation, just Caribbean spivs demanding trillions of pounds for slavery reparation, which have nothing to do with either historic slavery or modern slavery. They just want a pot they can stick their mitts into.
    Tell them all to sod off. You know it makes sense.

Priority shambles

It really dries up the milk of human kindness to read that a charity has sacked a quarter of its staff, presumably in response to our wonderful Chancellor’s National Insurance assault on working people, but the charity bosses still think it’s a good idea to waste £100,000 of donations on the salary of someone to be their head of diversity crap.

No great rush, then?

I was amazed to read that the estimate for fixing those sink holes in Surrey is at least a year. And it’s not just the people living next to the cavities who are suffering by having nowhere to live. All the businesses in the area are losing income.
    When The Universe has it in for you, it can get really, really vindictive!

Crazy craze

You have to be really short of something to do if your best is to make a video of dropping something heavy on your foot so you can rate how painful it is.
    Doing it with something that’s not likely to end up broken is one thing, but using a PC monitor or an air fryer? Just daft.
    But the internet needs content to put adverts round.

Another curve-ball

Picking a safe place to live is not always easy. You can find out if an area is subject to flooding quite easily, and you can choose to live on a road that rises up toward the top.
    But what about avoiding sink holes, like the pair that opened up in Godston, in Surrey?
    Not really something most people would think of.

Gone guy

Whatever happened to the distinctively named Adrian Zmed, the side-kick in T.J. Hooker? Okay, I could look up his biog on the interweb but it can’t be all that much if he’s not a regular in one of the other old episodes that I tend to watch.

Life bites back

It’s definitely alarming when the bathroom door knob comes away in your hand. Less so when the door isn’t closed, leaving you trapped.
    There on the floor was the fixing screw, which must have been quietly unscrewing itself for who knows how long.
    So what do you do about that?
    Make sure that every doorknob is fitted with the screw at the top, not underneath and out of sight?
    Send a minion round to check every doorknob in the mansion?
    Put a screwdriver in every room?
    That’s life all over; full of little surprises, some of them really quite nasty.

The trend

It seems that everything, but everything has to be rhubarb flavoured now. Which sounds like an excellent way to make everything boring and samey.
    Still, all the more of the unfashionable stuff for those who are not dedicated followers of fashion.

Reality bites bum

Well, I never. The Trump strategy has worked and our prime monster has been forced to divert cash to defence from foreigners who are never grateful and just yell for even more, no matter how much they get. And the spivs who make a mint out of the aid industry.

No better

Not that the current breed of politicians is any better than the ones who are being called failures. Not if they keep on lying about their Nett Zero agenda, which is ridiculously unaffordable.
    Every honest analysis comes out at the costs outweigh any benefits by a considerable margin.
    But still our sorry crew of politicians ploughs on.

More ‘blame it on the past’

The reason why judges are getting away with making what are frankly brain-dead decisions is the fault of the politicians of the past, they would have us believe.
    Former politicians failed to future-proof their laws by failing to realize how clottish some of the judges of the future would be!

Badly Educated

Why are MPs out of touch with reality? The universities most of them went to are getting the blame for allowing free speech to be banned and making only a far-Left agenda be acceptable.

Confected disaster

We keep being told that oil is running out and that’s why it’s necessary to waste trillions of pounds on occasional energy sources.
    Whatever happened to the view in the 20th century that we have 200 years’ known oil reserves now and much more as yet undiscovered?
    Whatever happened to fusion power, which was being touted as The Next Big Thing in the 1970s?
    Vested interests and climate crooks, that’s what.

Having a break

The BBC TV show Dr. Who is going into temporary retirement after the damage that the wokists of Disney have done to the franchise. But the BBC is threatening to revive it when most people have forgotten how dreadful it became.
    The James Bond film franchise is now in the hands of Amazon boss and space pioneer Mr. Bezos. Something else going down the same road?

Betrayal at every turn

Another jolly for Beer Smarmer this week; off to the US and a chance to stock up at the duty-free shop. Not that he’ll get much change out of D. Trump.
    The POTUS is a bloke who looks after his country’s interests. Smarmer is a bloke who kneels down in support of a dead foreign criminal, wants to donate £18 billion of our cash to Mauritius for no good reason and wants to tear up our copyright laws for big firms with A.I. projects.

What’s the game?

Are the nation’s judges in some sort of competition to see who can come up with the daftest reason for abusing the law in the favour of someone who doesn’t deserve it?
    Sure looks like that’s happening.

If Only

The Department of Government Efficiency in the US is hoping to be able to offer a DOGE Dividend of $5,000 to all American citizens after it has dispensed with the wasteful Blob elements in their civil service.
    The big problem with doing something like that here is that our wonderful Labour government would insist on a share for everyone, illegal immigrants included, and we’d all end up with about 3p each.

Confusion Achieved

President Trump has got himself noticed by everyone. His apologists, such as Nigel Farage, are having to interpret his ramblings. His enemies are claiming he’s been in the KGB’s pocket since the 1980s and that’s why he’s on Putin’s side.
    It will be interesting to see how this mess is resolved.

Good luck with that

The new Chancellor of Oxford University, former Conservative leader William Hague, is determined to trample all over the cancel and no-platform culture adopted by the snowflake students. It will be interesting to see how far and how fast he gets with his crusade.

Just a thought

How many virtue points does a council score if it bans phones in schools but fails to ensure that the little buggers with a phone actually go to their school?

Revelation

Daily Mail columnist Craig Brown has introduced me to a new word – unecdote. An anecdote is a small story, which can be funny. An unecdote is neither, just rambling piffle.
    Not that I’m exposed to them as I don’t watch the TV shows where they are common as fillers. Like the one hosted by someone called Graham Norton.

On the fiddle

As well as getting an undeserved pay rise, MPs have managed to cut a whole week out of their work time by skiving off early. MPs who can’t cope with the hours at Westminster are reported to have become zombies!

Another one

A spot more presumption from London’s useless mayor, who had the cheek to tell a meeting of EU ambassadors that Brexit was a mistake.
    “Not nearly as bit a mistake as you, mate!” seems to be the best counter.

Gone rogue

I must have nodded off for a minute, but when did it become illegal to notice that some judges are screwing up big time by inventing their own perverse version of the laws which came out of Parliament?
    And when were the bosses of the legal profession awarded the right to chide MPs and us non-legals for daring to disapprove of what the cowboys get up to?
    No sign of an apology for the presumption, but then that sort of person doesn’t.

Another Creaky Joe?

President Trump seems to have confused Putin’s assault on Ukraine with World War II if he thinks MILLIONS have died.
    The problem now is how to tell him he got it wrong if he knows everything.

Somewhat off target

There were big splodges of blue and yellow on yesterday’s weather map for where the Mansion is sited for today.
    But no rain, the sun is shining and the gales have stopped.
    Get out of that!

Defence for us

What we need is a defence against what the government is telling us about defence. We have Beer Smarmer’s madcap scam to put 15,000 troops we couldn’t raise and equip in Ukraine.
    We have the Defence Secretary going on about building up our forces with no extra cash on offer.
    Not a note of sanity or reality anywhere.

Olympians they ain’t

The bosses of the legal trade in England and Wales have the hump because politicians in the House of Commons, where laws are made, are daring to notice that immigration tribunal judges are abusing the laws made by Parliament.
    Is the government expected to ignore Judge Norton-Failure abusing a scheme for Ukrainian refugees to try to get Gazans into the UK? Something which is outraging Patricks Chrispys on GB Views.
    Or a ruling that a 23-year-old bloke from Sudan is a child refugee?
    We should be hearing about sackings of dodgy judges and promises from the bosses to do a better job in future, not this arrogant ranting.