Shop till you drop

The message from this year is that if you want to complete your Christmas menu, go out and buy the stuff yourself to be sure of having it ready to use.
    The number of big stores with a supply system that’s liable to suffer a technical glitch seems to be rather huge. Or is it just Chinese and Russian hackers at work to make lives in Britain miserable during the Festive Season?

Good or Bad?

The pollsters reckon 600,000 people over 65 didn’t speak to anyone else on Christmas Day and 1,400,000 ate their dinner alone. But what they haven’t disclosed is the proportions of the Oldies who weren’t bothered by their solitude.
    I wonder why not? Surely it wasn’t because the pollsters just didn’t think of it.

Agenda of spite?

What on Earth is our useless prime minister up to, letting Edstone Miliband waste £40 BILLION of our money on Nett Zero virtue-flagging garbage?
   Doesn't Smarmer get the simple scientific fact that NOTHING done here will change the global climate?
   Or maybe he does and it's just part of his agenda to waste as much of our money as possible as fast as he can using the biggest idiots he can find as pay-back for the universal lack of appreciation he’s getting.

Gnome missiles?

The American fleet in the Red sea lost a fighter that cost £53 million, which was shot down by one of the aircraft carrier’s escort cruisers just after it took off.
    A commercial flight from Azerbaijan was shot down by Russian missiles, killing most of the people aboard, as confirmed by Putin making an apology without actually admitting the blunder.
    What next?

Flawed Fantasy

Yes, the new Wallace & Gromit film on Xmas Day was a lot of fun. But why, oh why, was Wallace stoopid enough as to include ‘totally evil’ in the character settings for his gnome?
    Other than for plot purposes.

The idea had to come from somewhere

Given that Labour isn’t the party of original ideas, where did the current plan to divide the country into administrative areas, which have nothing to do with current divisions, come from?
    One possible source is the Nazi system of dividing the country into regional areas, each with a centrally appointed Gauleiter in charge.
    After the Labour ‘reorganization’, each district leader would be an all-powerful government stooge and party politics at local level would become extinct. Councils would exist only to carry out government orders and dissent would be non-existent.

Vorderperson Syndrome

It was good to see self-publicist Bear Grylls get a boot up the bum for claiming that the Jewish mother of the much mythologized Jesus was a Palestinian, when this concept didn’t exist a couple of millennia ago.
    Get on TV a few times and they think they know everything about everything.

Can’t lie convincingly

Ed Miliband was claiming that making us depend on occasional sources of electricity frees us from depending on fossil fuels from foreign dictators. Except that we import most of it from the United States, which isn’t exactly a dictatorship. And get top-ups from Qatar, which isn’t one either.
    But we do get all the solar panels that our wonderful government wants to shove all over former agricultural land from a real dictatorship – China. To which Labour is cosying up alarmingly.

Don’t Bother

Do we pay attention to new words, as the lady who wrote an article about them for the Daily Disaster would have us believe?
    Actually, no. They’re mainly created by silly people being obscure and there will be more of the same along next year.
    Stick to real words and although you might be throught to be without it, you will be understood. And you won’t succumb to brain rot caused by ploughing through the garbage on social meeja platforms.

Good point

A judge who got the credit for covering up the identities of the ‘professionals’ who failed a murdered child complained that it was because the Press can’t be trusted to be fair.
    Which is rather rich, given the tendency of judges to ignore laws as passed down by Parliament in favour of making up something that’s usually highly vexatiously left-wing.

A cheer for Beer

Surprise! We appear to be exceptional in one instance. No other country on the planet has a prime minister who is identified so readily by the description: ‘The Bog Brush’.

What they deserve

Apparently, there is a Shovel List; an invention of the Irish author Marian Keyes, of people who deserve a whack in the face with a shovel for their performance in 2024.
    Some would like to exclude Beer Smarmer and his gang of useless liars from it. I agree. They belong on a Double or Triple Shovel List.

On the nose!

The observation that our wonderful prime minister is right when he says the economy has stabilized provokes an automatic laugh. Until it’s explained that what he means is that it can’t get any deader!

Just NBG

Falls over in amazement! The Americans have actually admitted that Creaky Joe Biden was never fit for the job of being their president.
    Shame they don’t have a time machine to go back and get things right.

More non-delivery

Why isn’t the NHS making people well at a satisfactory rate? Because the idiots running it think it’s a wonderful idea to have a special day for all sorts of minorities, worthy and weird.
    How many millions will arranging Something Day for 240 groups cost us?
    And how many people could have been taken off a waiting list if the money had been spent as it should have been?

Yeah, but so what?

I see the petition for another general election has reached a magnificent 3 million signatures, and there’s going to be a debate on it in the Commons.
    Which will be a total waste of time. It will just give the Westminster Wonders a chance to contribute to global warming with more outbursts of hot air.

The perils of showing off

Anyone who buys an Apple or Samsung wrist watch cum multi-gadget, the experts reckon, exposes themself to perfluorohexanoic acid in the strap if they buy one of the top-end, really flash ones.
    And if that gets into your body, nothing good will come of it. So it’s a case of be a flash git but don’t be one for too long!

 

 

Mysterious ignorance

What comes after seventeen, eighteen and nineteen? Twenty, not two thousand. How come so many people on TV don’t get this when they say a date out loud?

One to make your mind up about

Our wonderful prime minister appointed Tulip Sadiq as his City minister to dig out corruption. Next thing you know, her family is being accused to taking bribes to let the Russians build a nuclear power station in Bangladesh when they were in charge there and of extracting £4 billion from the project.
    As Tulip is also under investigation, as there are lots of photos around of her with her family and Putin from the time when the deal was made, does that mean Smarmer was bright enough to appoint a minister who knew all the dodges dodgy types get up to? Doesn’t really sound like him, though.

There’s always one

When the Ombudsman had decided WASPI women didn’t get enough notice of the pension changes between 2005 and 2007, up jumped a Labour MP to blame it on the Tories.
    She clearly had no idea that Tony Blair and New Labour were in charge then. How sadly typical of the people the current Labour lot picked for their MP candidates.

Old dependable

You can rely on the Legend channel going out of the box on Xmas Day by sticking to T.J. Hooker @ 6 p.m. then The A-Team @ 7 p.m., as usual.
    And you can absolutely rely on a woke trigger warning for The A-Team!

Like it!

Labour cancelling next year’s council elections is like a kid [A. Rayner] taking her football home because she’s losing.

Seasonal?

What, one wonders, would the people who compile TV menus for all those stations do without all them war films they offer wall-to-wall for Xmas?

 

 

More Modern Times

My correspondent has another offering for Boxing Day:

 

Another Valid Point

Do we really want insurance companies to develop A.I systems to come up with cute reasons why they shouldn’t pay out what seem like valid claims to their customers?
    Sounds like what we need is more hissy, cute assassins taking out the bosses of these companies to encourage a sudden outbreak of honesty.
    Either that, or prominent warnings, posted by law, that the company uses A.I. to swindle customers.

Imagination lacking

I see GB Views has given Ben Leo, the usual stand-in for Patrick Chrispys, his own graphic background. Shame it’s a total graphic design disaster. Two lots of sans-serif characters for the name above TONIGHT. Dreadful.
    They could have given him a font with serifs to bulk the name out a bit. There’s no excuse for being so clumsy, designwise.

Two Tier Justice

Assault a politician by throwing a milkshake at him and you can get away with it and not go to gaol if your brief claims you’re a bit of a nutter.
    Put some rubbish on the internet and it’s a gaol sentence no matter what your brief says and no matter if there’s no proof that it incited some nutter to do something violent.

Modern Times

A contribution from a correspondent:

 

Modern Major Morons

It seems to be compulsory for every once respected institution to be run by idiots these day. Like the English National Opera, which has plastered trigger warnings on a revival of The Pirates of Penzance, which is approved for 5-year-olds and upwards.
    What have they done? Shoved an alcohol warning on a glass of sherry and violence warnings on pirates just waving their pistols around.
    If only there were somewhere we could export all the idiots to. That would certainly solve the housing shortage at a stroke.

Today’s Unkind Thought

We don’t want the prime minister doing a State of the Nation speech full of alibis for his failures. All we really want to hear about him is that a particularly large freebie fell on him and the funeral is on Wednesday.

Christmas Rip-Off

Same size, same content, same wrapper – apart from the 11% price gouge from Mr. Cadbury.

 

Xmas Cracker Joke

“If she’s an economist, Old King Cole was the Queen of Sheba”
    Which failed Labour Chancellor was this said about?
[style note; that ‘failed’ is probably tautology as no Labour Chancellor has been up to the job, particularly Gordon Brown.]

Valid point

“Why shouldn’t our wonderful prime minister betray the WASPI women if he’s done it to everyone else?” one of my more cynical correspondents wondered.
    But he does have a point. As he added: “Fair’s fair.”

What’s he up to?

Despite the UK being infested by wall-to-wall Chinese spies, including the one exposed by MI5's top agent Prince Andrew, our prime minister is still trying to cosy up to the Chinese regime. Which is leaving the rest of us wondering what he’s been offered.
    No point in asking Beer, of course, he’ll just lie to us.

One we’ll go for

According to one gang of experts, drinking a glass of wine a day reduces the risk of having a heart attack more than taking drugs like statins. It’s definitely a more pleasant form of medication!

Well, they would

The BBC is getting a lock of mockery for refusing to play a spoof Christmas song which blames our lying git of a prime minister for freezing pensioners by stealing their winter fuel.
    All the news that’s fit to print/report after the Labour party censor has been on the job?

Unintended diversion

Another observant Daily Disaster reader noted that when watching Beer Smarmer on TV with the mute button pressed (like every normal person), Beer sticks his head forward like a chicken pecking up scraps when he makes a spurious point.
    Something to look out for whilst waiting to unmute the TV.

Morons keep doing it to us

The idiots building the H2S rail link are blowing £100 million on a bat tunnel to stop them being damaged by the trains. One large problem, the idiots were told 3 years ago that the little buggers can crawl through the mesh of the wire used for the tunnel.
    But, of course, that’s being ignored. No wonder the cost of this piece of fantasy is heading for £100 BILLION.

Trust somewhat absent

Our Home Secretary substitute, Pixie Balls-Cooper, claims that 13,500 rejected migrants have been sent back where they came from.
    “Where’s the proof?” a Daily Disaster reader asked.
    That’s where all the lies have left Smarmer’s government; nothing can be taken on trust.

Put a sock in it

The BBC TV News at lunchtime yesterday fell into the same trap as GB Views on Friday night - endless repetition of a few facts with the same pictures, and yards of wibble about the Magdeburg Monster.
    A brief summary then real news from elsewhere would have been much more sensible. Strange that allegedly professional news services don’t know this.

To party or not

Oh, dear! Snowflakes can’t stand the stress of being at an office party and need cash compensation for having to attend. And any who are done the favour of not being invited want cash compensation for being excluded.
    Life is one long racket for some people.

Not much of an advert for us

Making the bloke who was booted out of the Blair Cabinet not once but twice for playing fast & loose with the rules of conduct our ambassador to the United States does us no favours.
    But then, it’s probably impossible to come up with one of the Labour lot who isn’t dodgy and/or who hasn’t slagged off Trump in the last decade or so.

What’s on the other side?

Patricks Chrispys lost a viewer last night. The decision to make his two hours on GB Views all about the terror attack on the Xmas market at Magdeburg was a big blunder.
    The known facts could be summed up in 5 minutes last night. The rest was just speculation by talking heads and aimless wibble.
    Which is why some of us were reduced to watching repeats of Mr. Bean and then Dynamo, the magician.

Sharia? Not Here!

Islamic Sharia ‘law’ has no legal place in the UK and the big mystery is why a system that treats women as mere chattels doesn’t have the self-righteous Left up in arms over this blatant abuse of female human rights outside every one of the 85 sharia ‘courts’ in the country.
    Not keen to take on a culture which is armed and known to be dangerous?

No better further north

The Scottish government introduced Minimum Unit Pricing to try to reduce the embarrassingly high death rate due to alcohol over-indulgence.
    Unfortunately, no one in the SNP realized that their subjects could still buy booze online at English prices, or go on booze cruises to the north of England to stock up.
    As a result, alcohol-related deaths are up by 12% since MUP was introduced.

Just not looking for solutions

Smarmer’s Army is intent on building 1,500,000 new houses on the Green Belt. But I read the other day that in England alone, there are 700,000 properties standing empty and unused.
    But, of course, it’s too much to expect our wonderful government to spot a way to get half-way to its target by other means. A total lack of enterprise seems to be Labour’s hallmark.

Frankenfoods, the only way!

If our wonderful government is intent on covering the countryside with houses for illegal immigrants, solar panels and wind farms instead of food farms, and the country will be too broke to afford food imports after Chancellor Reeves wrecks everything completely, what’s left?
    Frankenfoods grown in laboratories!
    Ultra-processed gunk disguised to look vaguely like real food.
    What a wonderful prospect!

Getting it right

What GB Views needs is an alternative set of titles for
    NOT Patrick Chrispy’s Tonight
when he’s skiving off and Ben Leo does the show.

Always some spin

The story we’re getting from the outsted Syrian tyrant BashedEar Assad is that he didn’t run away from the invading Sham terrorist gang.
    Oh, no. He was hauled off the front line on the orders of Putin and flown out of the country to avoid embarrassment to the old Pants Poisoner.

Telling it like it really is

Boris Johnson is way off the mark if he thinks people believed what they were told by Smarmer & Co. before the election. Labour got the support of only 20% of the electorate, and got to form a goverment only because of ‘Vote Reform, Get Labour’.

The Law administrators are asses

Just what was the point of a secret immigration court ruling that the Chinese spy who chummed up with Prince Andrew had to remain anonymous?
    Especially when his name and picture were all over the media in China and the United States, not to mention every libel lounge going.
    The judiciary desperately needs to get in touch with real life in the 21st century.

About her mark

When in Opposition, Smarmer’s deputy used to get on Boris the leader’s case for having an official photographer. Now, she has a whole gang of them. “Hippocrisy with a bum to match”, is definitely a great way of labelling Rayner.

About his mark

Picking a fight with Tory leader Kemi Badenoch over whether sandwiches are the bee’s knees shows just how desperate Smarmer is. He even felt obliged to put some stooge in front of a press conference for his counterblast. Which served only to remind everyone about that mess that clot Miliband made of tackling a bacon sandwich a decade ago.

Yes, he does suck

It comes as no surprise to learn that Beer Smarmer’s lack-of-approval rating makes him the worst prime minister ever. Add on the fact that his fantasist of a Chancellor is all set to put the economy into recession for the final quarter of the year, and it’s time to go into fear and trembling about what this sorry crew will achieve over the next four and a half years.

Inconvenient Memory

It’s all very well for Particks Chrispys on GB Views to trot out former Labour minister Geoff Hoon as a ‘expert’. But there are lots of us around who remember that he was known as Buff Hoon when he was part of the New Labour government.
    So not exactly someone who inspires confidence.

More what they do

“Why don’t men condemn all those who queue up to sleep with models?” asked the blessed Byrony Gordon in the Daily Disaster. Because the world is full of slags, male and female, and they will always be able to seek one another out.

Justice Confused

The wheels seem to be coming off the Lucy Letby mass-murder case at a furious rate. Suddenly, one of the doctors changes his mind about the cause of three of the deaths. In fact, the whole thing seems to be a morass of guesses and probabilities and very short of confirmable facts.

It’s what they do

Is it any surprise that the SNP’s ministers are as good as the mob in Westminster at hoovering up football-related freebies and not mentioning them when they are supposed to account for their free gifts?
    Not really. They’re all politicians and out of the same box.

Vanity is everything!

The Royal Princes, William and Harry, are getting the credit for a boom in business for a Turkish hair transplant clinic. It seems that there are lots of people with cash in their pockets who think it would be a great idea to have a beard, but who can’t grow a decent one unaided.

Illusory Crisis

What exactly is unreasonable about Prince Andrew associating with this Chinese spy if no one in the Security Service had spotted him?
    And if he dropped the spy as soon as his cover was blown a couple of years ago, Andy did exactly the right thing.
    Move along there, no sensation.

More of them

Another good way to irritate Smarmer’s Army is to notice the lack of diversity in Beer’s Cabinet. He’s surrounded by people who were in the public sector, if they had a job at all, and there is a complete lack of people with experience of life in the wealth-creating private sector.

Unwelcome truths

Our wonderful government doesn’t like being reminded that its plan to build everywhere is doomed because there aren’t enough builders to get close to their plucked out of the air target to consign the Green Belt to history. And the Labour lot really do not respond well when told that the main beneficiaries of their housing will be illegal immigrants, not the British citizens who paid for it.

Cute

Brilliant idea by Jenni Murray. If you tear a toenail half off, go on a Saga cruise and get the ship’s doctor to tidy you up and put you on antibiotics.
    Of course, when you get home, with GPs unavailable, you end up spending most of the day in an A&E department for follow-up treatment. But better than nothing. Just.

Get Out Of That!

Beer Smarmer claimed that his grand plan for shaking up the civil service Blob would land on desks across Whitehall. But, as been pointed out by numberous people, the occupants of those desks are all Skiving @ Home. Another Smarmer flop.

No change likely

How many more vulnerable children will die before we reform a failing system? was asked after the conviction of her evil father for killing Sara Sharif.
    As she was failed by social services, the police, her teachers and everyone, the answer would appear to be: ‘all of them’.

Sussed!

How do you get Defence up to 2.5% of GDP? The Labour way, cunning blighters, is to wreck the economy, reduce the current GDP, and also reduce Defence spending to the extent that it reaches 2.5% of the shattered GDP.
    Devilishly cunning!

Big Puzzle

Last night, the Geminid meteors were supposed to be lighting up the sky with a magnificent display. One slight snag; wall to wall rain clouds.
    If people were able to see them in years past, why isn’t all this alleged climate change giving us clear skies now? Warmer and dryer it most certainly ain’t.

Rather inevitable, really

What do you get when the Prime Minister guarantees that he will deliver economic growth but he and the Chancellor spend all their time talking the country down?
    Negative economic growth due to a lack of confidence.
    How odd that Smarmer and Reeves are where they are without being able to spot something like that as a consequence of their gobsworthness?

Some Description!

“Nazi stag do ex-Tory MP", was how he was described in the headline after joining Reform UK. Nothing in the way of a name came to mind and I started wondering if it was a pop at Reform; saying the party’s standards are so low that anyone can get in.
    Aidan Burley? Nope. Nothing.
    Apparently Nigel Farage gave him a real roasting in 2011 at the time of the transgression. But if he’s okay now, does that confirm that standards have fallen?

I’m an alien!

Apparently, we have a Foreign Secretary who thinks that Libya on the Mediterranean coast of North Africa is next door to Syria, which 1,000 miles away in the Middle East.
    Which suggests his ignorance is due to being so foreign that he’s from another planet and he has no idea of the geography of this one.

Fat Chance

You have to admit that our prime minister can come out with some really wonderful stuff. Such as using the ideas of Desperate Dom Cummings to disrupt the comfortable and idle lives of the useless bozos of the civil service Blob and force them to become productive.
    But when you take a look at Smarmer’s ‘achievements’ since moving into Downing Street, and those of his minions, it becomes pretty obvious that they’re as useless as the Blob and they need some disrupting, too.

Nice Idea

Reading that The Observer is to be sold off by Guardian Media alerted me to the existence of Tortoise Media, the purchaser, which doesn’t do breaking news.
    The item included the interesting piece of speculation that Tortoise had decided to slow down because its minions couldn’t cope mentally with the dramas of having the ‘hold the front’ page when they’d spent ages assembling it.

More unintended stuff

Letting parents shirk @ home instead of going to work is ruining the education of their kids but because the parents let their offspring bunk off school without consequences.
    Still, I suppose it’s all an effective part of natural selection.

No. 1 in a Field of One

Anyone in need of a bit of exercise can get quite a lot by counting the number of luvvies who are absolutely outraged by Time Magazine making Donald Trump its Man of the Year.
    But who else has made the same impact as Trump? Certainly not any of the other politicians on offer. And the do-gooders haven’t exactly shone this year.

Moving on

Building houses without chimneys is leaving kids wondering how Santa gets in to deliver their presents. And whether parking a sleigh on the roof destroys solar panels.
    Maybe modern myth-makers need to throw in a bit of sci-fi stuff and change the story to Santa using a flying saucer, which lets him hover over homes with a cluttered roof and use a transporter system to beam down to deliver gifts and enjoy any hospitality left out for him.

Flattened, out of action

Storm D, I read, wrecked a solar farm on Anglesey and blew the blades off wind turbines nearby. Not much of hope of energy security from occasionals which are also wreckables as they can’t be protected. No substitute for a strongly built, proper power station.

Flatten, replace

There is a very plausible explanation for why the Labour party is trying to kill off our domestic farming industry.
    It’s being done to create vast tracts of unused former agricultural land on which to park solar panels, wind farms & houses for the migrants, which Labour is making no attempt to exclude, so that they can form colonies in which the British values which Labour despises so much are entirely absent.

Destined to fail?

The Post Office Horizon accounting system is a mass of defects, which had ruined lives and killed a few people. What was the PO’s answer? Go for an in-house replacement, which had just been junked after wasting £2 BILLION.
    Meanwhile, Fujitsu, which came up with the defective system, is under contract to keep it going to March 2026.

Mad house maths

A solar farm with an output of 500 mW is being claimed to be able to supply electricity to 300,000 home. Each of which gets 167 Watts. Which is one-sixth of the amount needed to boil an electric kettle.
    That’s the sort of stuff that comes out of Edstone Milipede’s fantasy department.

OUR values matter

In this country, we are free to think – and say – religions are weird and those involved in them are weirdos.
    The last thing we need is arrogant upstarts from other cultures demanding we give their particular religion a free pass.
    Or outsiders demanding that we regard (forced) cousin marriages as a Good Thing.

Not worth the effort

How to build a nuclear bunker in your back garden; if it’s long enough; for 97 quid, I read.
    If the nuke lands far enough away not to vaporize you, you’d have to live in your hole in the ground for a couple of weeks to let radiation levels fall.
    Then what? With everything wrecked?

Pay-back!

I couldn’t help but laugh on reading that a celebrity chef who demanded with a gang of other attention seekers before the election that it was time to give Labour a chance has come unstuck.
    He got his wish and our wonderful Chancellor’s tax grabs are going to cost him £170,000 per year. Oh, dear.

Just Nasty

Our wonderful Chancellor seems quite smug about the fact that she was able to snatch a winter fuel payment from her own mother.
    What we need is a rogue asteroid to crash onto Downing Street while all the nasty bastards are scoffing their Xmas dinner.

Reality in short supply

Kelvin McKenzie, the former editor of The Sun, got it spot on on the Mogg Show last night. Opinions are treated as more valuable than facts online.
    Which just underlines how ludicrous things can get in the libel lounges.

Just a thought

Didn’t Brexit-buggerer made French prime minister Bollocks to Barnier lose a confidence vote in the parliament?
    If he’d lost a no-confidence vote, logically that would mean people have confidence in him.

Action this day!

Another good comment – if the government is planning to ban junk food advertising on TV next October(!), maybe, how about an immediate ban on junk political advertising?
    That would relieve a lot of pressure on the nation’s TV remote control mute buttons.

Somewhere safer

Laos is definitely off the schedule for a Xmas break if the clubs serve vodka laced with methanol and the police and the local authorities are okay with letting them do it in return for kick-backs.

If only

Don’t you just wish King Charles would refuse to sign off on a knighthood for London’s totally useless lump of a mayor?
    Kahn’s dad had an honest job; a bus driver. Is he the only member of the family in that position?
    What would be even better would be for the King to cancel Smarmer’s knighthood on the grounds that he is not behaving like a fit and proper member of the Order.

He got it right!

A fine piece of analysis of Smarmer’s Pinewood film studios performance agrees with him when he said he wasn’t offering a reset.
    All that was on offer was more of the original false starts, lies and blunders of his first five months.

No doom! Damn!

One does get a distinct impression that the doombuggers felt cheated out of the major tsunami they wanted as a consequence of an earthquake of strength 7.0 on Richter scale miles out in the Pacific off the north coast of California.
    Nothing less than a mountain of water sweeping right across California and Oregon would have got a cheer from the miserable doombuggers.

Stairway to oblivion?

How many beers had Smarmer scoffed before he declared in his film studio Take Two speech that he has his milestones ‘all laddered up’?
    Does that mean he’s going to pile them up to form steps instead of space them out as progress markers?
    Where do they dig clots like him up from?

More Wibble

“Up to 100% more plaque removal”, says the TV advert. Why don’t they go for up to 1,000% more? It’s just as meaningless.
    Both ranges include 0% removal, which is completely bloody useless and makes the product a waste of money.

Just the bloke!

Is P. Hairy Mandelswine, who was sacked from the Blair government for being cute about a £372,000 loan, a suitable candidate for UK ambassador to the US?
    Based on the standards of Smarmer’s Army, he fits right in to the gang.

It doesn’t stop

The moron doing the Daily Mail quick crossword is still claiming that treacle is the same as golden syrup. There is no hole deep enough in which to dump a lummox like this.

Another world

Deliberately misleading the House of Commons is a resignation affair for a prime minister. Unless you’re Beer Smarmer.
    Ain’t it wonderful to be a lawyer!

Sort of logical

A bloke claiming to be a woman winning a model of the year prize has its own internal logic. The bloke has been got up to look like a woman and the word ‘model’ is not sex-specific. So he can be declared a prize-worthy model of a woman.

Mission not worthwhile?

Some of my older friend are beginning to ask, with due cynicism, if it’s worth making the effort not to be one of the 6,000 pensioners the government plans to freeze to death over the winter with 4 more years of Labour vindictiveness in prospect.

We’re Doomed

That useless lump of a Chancellor Reeves is claiming we can’t boost defence spending without making cuts. The trouble is, she’d make a bog of the job.
    We need less management duplication and red tape, equipment buyers who don’t keep changing their minds every two seconds, driving up costs and pushing back delivery dates, NO diversity crap, etc.
    No change of anything like that from Reeves, and the useless gang at the Ministry of Defence, of course.

Lost nation

If a bloke in a BBC Question Time audience thinks populism is the same as Nazi Germany, all that proves is that the Beeb is great at filling a studio with weirdos.
    And given the current state of the nation, it doesn’t take all that much effort.

Nett Zero empathy

No names, no pack drill, but my correspondents are agreed that if there were an announcement on the news that a member of this sorry imitation of a Cabinet had gone down with a condition which is both painful and lethal, there wouldn’t be even a flicker of sympathy.
    None of the correspondents has ever felt this way about politicians before. It takes a special kind of person to get others to think something like that about them. Shame that Smarmer’s Army is full of them.

Not a good move

Someone was asking in the Daily Disaster for an assisted living Bill if we can have an assisted dying one. But if we did, it would apply only to the weath-gobbling public sector, not the wealth-creating private sector, and most people would end up worse off.

Get out of that!

Someone has worked out that if Prince Hairy has less security in the UK than popster T. Swift, it’s because she has more fans here. Which makes a lot of sense.

Valid Point

You can’t base assisted dying on how long a doctor thinks the customer has to live because the medical trade is notorious for getting this wrong.

One way – The wrong way

Is Elon Musk’s contempt for our PM the world’s biggest threat to a special relationship between the UK and the US. Or is it the stream of bad-mouthing directed westwards from Beer Starmer and his sorry crew the real problem?
    And then there’s the gang of 100 Labour sent to the US to try to stop Trump becoming president again by working for the Democraps. Not at all a bridge-builder.

Completely Clueless

Does a man with a plan for change need to set up 67 talking shops about what he should do – which won’t offer any conclusions until well into next year? Not unless it’s true that Starmer is not an ideas man and without having a list of Tory policies to be against, he’s floundering.
    And don’t it show?

Universal uselessness?

It’s not just our public services that can’t get the job done. The train companies went after 29,000 fare dodgers, I read, but used the wrong law to get them fined.
    As a result, the fines have been cancelled by the courts. And there are thousands of similar cases still in the system.
    Now, as we have to do is decide if this is worse or less serious than the Office for National Statistics chumps getting the net migration figure for 2021-23 wrong by 307,000.

Just monstrous exaggeration

If the carbon emissions due to manufacturing an electric car are included with those resulting from driving it around, the difference between it an a petrol/diesel vehicle becomes notional.
    You’d have to drive the EV for 124,000 miles to get a relative reduction in emissions of 15%.
    Not exactly a lot, is it?

Oh, wonderful!

Another gift from multiculturalism – armed police officers on patrol at Christmas markets in case some Islamist nutter tries to let off a bomb or stab loads of people to death.
    No chance of any tolerance of the native way of life in the country they’ve been allowed to invade so casually.

Tell ’em like it is!

“Feathers are worn by beautiful birds and ugly people” read the sign held up by an attention-seekr @ a fashion show.
    To which the obvious response is: “Why aren’t you wearing any feathers, love?”

As ever, it’s all about him

It’s not possible to feel anything other than enormous contempt for a prime minister who wants to wreck the country and people’s lives just so he can claim to be a world leader in climate change.
    Even if nothing done here has the slightest effect on the global climate.

Blessed silence

Do we care about all this crap about TV bloke Gregg Wallace? Nope. We’ve heard more than enough of the accusations and the denials. Hit the mute button as we do when the government’s liars like Smarmer and Reeves start spouting more of their poisonous BS.

Doing Nothing

Islamists demanding a blasphemy law is as offensive as the likes of professional fat lady and Daily Disaster columnist Bryony Gordon demanding the Band Aid crew stop raising cash for bits of Africa.
    “Why don’t they cough up the cash?” she whines. Ignoring the fact that Bob Geldoff et al have been making a difference for 40 years whilst she and the Africans, who are whingeing about the charity exposing their continent as violent and institutionally corrupt, have just been sitting on their fat bums.

Too Right

An interesting view on assisted dying – letting the State kill sick people would be troubling under a competent government. Thus allowing it with Smarmer’s shambolic Army in charge would be catastrophic and downright criminal.

Fourteen wasted years?

Having spent almost a decade and a half in opposition, you’d think the Labour party would have worked out some ideas which might do the country a bit of good.
    But after gaining 20% of the votes available on the basis of a manifesto which was wall-to-wall lies from start to finish, they’ve hid the buffers.
    Beer Smarmer is having to do a reset. But not admitting it.

Surprise!

GB Views have managed to dig their Latvian lad, Patricks Chrispys, out of his box and get him back fronting the show wearing his name.
    Great job if you can skive off for ages like that.

Nul Points for effort

Shame Asda had to rip off the A-Team theme tune for an Xmas ad instead of coming up with something original.

Fair game

Just a thought, but is there any newspaper scribe who isn’t taking the piss out of Rachel Thieves? Like Louise of the GMB, who realized in the Sunday Post that our Chancellor’s halcyon days were when she was leading NASA’s mission to Mars.

What they do

One of the trade unions in the education sector wants our current government to undo all the Tory efforts to make school exams harder and their results more meaningful.
    Why? To give the union’s members more time off and more wellbeing. Selfish gits.

Low news day

Should we feel comforted that most of today’s newspapers have nothing more serious to put on their front pages than endless wibble about this BBC TV star Wallace and the middle-aged women who get the hump over his smutty jokes?
    One of the exceptions was the looney left i, which wants us to believe that 47 is greater than 53. So something safely to be ignored.

Super-selectivity

Another bloke on GB Views the other night in a discussion about assisted dying was asking if we can trust our legislators to get things right.
    The lesson of history is that we can’t.
    The only state which downgraded its citizens in the last 200 years, this guy claimed, was the Nazis. Wot about the Soviets, North Korea, the Chinese, etc., etc.?
    Inconvenient to the argument so don’t mention?

What the PM should have said . . .

. . . to the MP demanding a blasphemy law.
    “If you want to live here, you must be willing to accept our values and way of life. We find this failure to do so by migrants and those of incomer stock insulting and their lack of tolerance of an alien (to them) culture contemptible.
    “Anyone who doesn’t like things here is free to go elsewhere. Which will do us the favour of having to put up with one less vexatious control freak.”
    But not something a jellyfish like Beer would do.

Nice one!

From a Daily Disaster reader: If we got a lot of snow, Bier Smarmer will claim his grandad was a snowman.
    And no doubt that fantasist Reeves will claim she invented them.

Wonkosity on steroids

A really daft notion got a lot of mockery on GB Views last night – the notion that females are either transgender women or non-transgender women.
    Clear evidence that there are deep depths of stoopidity left for the woke community to plumb.

Some giant

There’s a huge amount of wibble in The Sunday Post about Alex Salmond. A giant of a man? Nope, just another politician who was trying to sell independence to a country which can’t survive without huge subsidies from England, and a bit of a groper.
    He made people walk tall? Just ludicrous.
    He bigged things up in the SNP until he became an embarrassment and had to zoom off and form another party.
    But all in all, he was just a blip in John Swinney’s stewardship of the SNP.

They just don’t get The Market

Labour sets targets for electric car sales which the industry knows are daft. Result: Vauxhall closes a car plant and jobs and economic growth prospects go up in smoke.
    The plant being closed is in Luton. Who’s the member for South Lution? Some woman called Reeves. Does she care? Has she even noticed?

Another context issue

Were 14 years of largely wasted Tory/Trivial rule really any different from the previous 13 years of wasted Labour rule? What we need is some context questions, such as how many illegal wars did the Tories start compared to Labour (Iraq) and how many medical emergencies did either government have to tackle? (The Chinese plague, major, Tories, Swine Flu, minor, Labour)